Eating Disorders Support Group

Eating disorders are marked by an obsessive need to control the intake and/or purging of food. This community is dedicated to those struggling on the road to recovery. Join to discuss your experience with others and find support. Get advice, ask questions, and meet others who are going through similar struggles.

3,896 Members
20,112 Posts
0 Online
Mental Health
/ Eating Disorders Support Group

That familiar feeling (triggering)

Alliegator
Alliegator
I am feeling shaky, dizzy, light-headed exhaustion. I remember this feeling from when I was anorexic four years ago. It feels wonderful and terrifying at the same time. I haven't been eating much today. Way more than I did when I was sick but not as much as I should be eating. I know I need to snap out of this. I am making some dinner but I'm not sure how much I will end up eating. I feel so torn between anorexia and normalcy.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I can't offer much advice, but know that my thoughts and prayers are with you. Hang in there.
deleted_user
deleted_user
So did you end up eating? How are you feeling now?
MermaidSinger
MermaidSinger
That feeling is addictive. It is similar to the high a heroin user feels when they shoot up or the euphoria an alcohlic feels when they take a sip. You need to believe that you are in control. Fight the urge to go back to anorexia. You need to make sure you are fueling your body and not letting yourself get too hungry, because that can be a trigger. Sure, anorexia is a quick fix. but you know what? With an eating disorder you are not alive. You detach from the emotions necessary to feel in order to truly live. Normalcy may mean facing pain, but at least you'll be a human being rather than a puppet on strings.
Alliegator
Alliegator
I ended up eating. But then I ended up turning to SI instead and I cut.
deleted_user
deleted_user
that's good that u ended up eating! just not that u ended up cutting. but hey one step at a time!
deleted_user
deleted_user
I hope you are seeing a therapist and can talk to him about ED crawling back into your life. Good luck!
Alliegator
Alliegator
I am seeing a therapist but for a while. She is out of town. I might be able to get an urgent appointment though. I don't really know if I want it. My problems aren't "urgent" are they? I am eating I just wish I wasn't. I did start cutting again but I can stop it. it will all be fine. It has to be fine.
deleted_user
deleted_user
it will be ok... you just need some help dealing right now.... stress, anxiety... something is triggering you...

you are chsing a high to ignore your feelings... just like a drug addict...

but you will be ok.... fight hard, keep working it out babe... tomorrow is another day..