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Swim suit/Summer = hell

nms77
nms77
I REALLY struggle with my weight/body stuff in the summer, like anyone else. I am so self conscious I never wear shorts, and I almost never wear tank tops (ugh, fat upper arms). So, I choose to sweat it out. Then there's the whole....swim suit issue. I have a 2 piece that covers my torso (NO bikini for this one!) and all I do is constantly pull my top down. And when I sit down, I just see my fat rolls when I look down :( This is fresh as I JUST got home from the lake with my kids and spent most of it in my swim suit. Having kids, all they want me to do is get in the water with me. But I feel like everyone is just staring at how gross I look. "Why would SHE wear that?", "Shouldn't she cover up?". And then when I See someone in a bikini I am jealous I don't look like that, and even if they are curvy, I say, "how are they so confident?"
My mind is my own worst enemy and summer time is my own version of hell.
Anyone else??
kathywonders
kathywonders
Again I cant really relate entirely but when I go to the beach and on those rare occasions when its warm enough to be in swim wear I see all shapes and sizes "hanging out"! Nobody seems to care whether they are trim or bulgy and I - an ex-slave to body image - think its just great that people dont mind showing off their "imperfections"

We dont know what other people are thinking. I know it sounds cruel or maybe even silly to say it doesnt matter, but I think we need to try and work on consciously making it matter less. Its so sad that these issues get in the way of having fun with your kids. Would a one-piece swimsuit help at all?
nms77
nms77
My 2 piece looks like a 1 piece (I got it real quick when I was taking a trip to FL in January and I live in NY, so not much selection!). I would probably feel the same in a one piece. But I'm going to try getting a different top and see if that helps.

I know that my obstacle is my brain and what it tricks me into thinking/believing. I was talking to my boyfriend about it all last night and said, "I just need to know how to reprogram my brain is all". That's all! LOL!!
Laraine17
Laraine17
Google plus size swimsuits and just see the wonderful pics that come up whether you want to reveal or cover up. You are right about reprogramming our brains, takes time and I don't think I will ever get it right lol but hey Ive found great friends here while trying my best. Go get that gorgeous swimsuit!
josefk
josefk
coming from a completly diffrnt angle (totaly skinny guy) what i can say about this is i dnt evr realy notice people's bodies like that. i dnt look at people and think they're fat or need to lose weight or he/she shouldn't be wearing that.
i do notice people pulling at their clothes or the people who are alwys covering themselves with their arms in front of them or holding somethng in front of them and i notice the people who are all covred up and sweating bullets in summr and wish theyd just not worry abot it and be comfortable.
cuz honestly when u wear cloths that fit and tht u like and that mtch the season everybody looks good. confidence looks good even if u have to fake it.
theres alwys gonna be a few assholes out thre who judge but theyd judge if u were a size 0 so screw them and be happy.
kathywonders
kathywonders
Good comment Josefk. I do believe there are plenty people who dont really notice what other people look like. Then there are those who notice but for whom its not a big deal - who realise that people have a right to swim and sunbathe whatever shape they are. Of course there are all sorts in this world. Probably there are some people who, for all kinds of different reasons, get upset seeing other peoplesbodies and wish that everyone else was fatter or thinner or more beautiful or whatever. But even if youre seen by someone like that - so what - thats their problem!