Eating Disorders Support Group
Eating disorders are marked by an obsessive need to control the intake and/or purging of food. This community is dedicated to those struggling on the road to recovery. Join to discuss your experience with others and find support. Get advice, ask questions, and meet others who are going through similar struggles.
Hi everyone! I'm new to support groups and recovery in general so please bear with me. I've been bulimic since 16 years of age. I lie about what I'm doing, and I stay up after my boyfriend goes to bed so I can binge and purge at nighttime. I hoard food and if I'm having a bad day I will tear through my entire pantry. My appetite seems completely unstoppable. I use laxatives and vomit and occasionally use diuretics. I lost over 100lbs in 2013 and everyone hailed me a motivational inspiration. I'm not, but I'm so afraid to tell anyone. I feel like a failure.
My life is on the line. I can feel it. I've lost a molar, my immune system is not cooperating with me (I will get oral thrush TOO OFTEN), and I had 3 RIND's in 2009 which are a type of reversible stroke. I have no energy. My only solace is my ADHD medication which keeps me from binging during the day and making better decisions at nighttime.
I just need people to talk to so that I don't feel so alone. Thank you for reading this and I hope we can help each other along the road to recovery <3
Lauryn
Please know that whenever you feel like a complete failure - there are people who've done worse mistakes than you.
Do not feel alone, because you are not. You look in the mirror and see a complete failure. I read your post and see someone willing to and trying really hard to change.
Every day is a new life to a wise man. Its totally okay to fail, but completely wrong to give up.
I struggle with binge eating myself, and nothing other than patience has helped bringing my binge episodes down (I'm still less than half way towards my goal of complete recovery)
Thanks for sharing your story here, its nice to know that many people share the same uphill journey like I do and fight with such strong feelings of guilt.
Please let me know if you ever need someone to talk to.
Thanks!
You are so NOT ALONE. Please keep that in mind. It's a truly empowering thing to know that others are fighting the same struggle that you are. You are amoung people here that really get and understand what you're going through. Keep posting here and feel free to share in your struggles. We're all here for you:))) I've kept my comments brief (a huge triumph for me!! LOL) because the ladies commenting prior to me have done an amazing job at expressing any blather that may come out of my mouth at this point;)
Message me at any point if you want to talk.
Huge hugs....
Jen
I think the first step is coming onto this website and admitting you are struggling. I applaud you for this! Hopefully is frees you from even the smallest feeling of being in this prison we call our ED. I cannot imagine what you are going through but I do know that feeling of being this fraud to others. Part of my ED was overexercising. I have only identified myself with being an athlete and I am a triathlete. Everyone saw me as this inspiration for being so fit and healthy and athletic and how badly they wished they could do it. What they didnt know was everything ED that took over my life in the background of my athlete persona. The fact that you are on here is such a great first step to freeing yourself from this disease and everyone on here is amazing!
message me if you need anything!
Robyn