Sometimes I feel that this is not a problem and that I am happy with my ED behaviors. Somedays I am so happy with how skinny I am and I still LOVE to exercise 2 hours per day, that the issues with c/s and and being "too skinny" don't seem that bad. I know this is not the "right" thing to think but does this mean that treatment is not going to help, that I am not fully committed to change? Sometimes I think since no one knows about my problems that they cannot hurt anyone. Heck, I don't have any friends or significant other in my life to disappoint. I have a great daughter and I keep it all away from her. We have a great relationship and a lot of fun together. I just wait until she goes to bed and then "indulge" my eating disorder. I get the "too skinny" looks at work, but lots of compliments at the gym. I am 5'5" and 102 lbs which I know is not healthy numbers but am I making a problem bigger than it is? Or is this all part of the disorder trying to convince me that I am ok when I am not?
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