Eating Disorders Support Group
Eating disorders are marked by an obsessive need to control the intake and/or purging of food. This community is dedicated to those struggling on the road to recovery. Join to discuss your experience with others and find support. Get advice, ask questions, and meet others who are going through similar struggles.
so this week has been very difficult so far. I was fine over the weekend and not eating much. Like maybe 100-200 calories. Monday I over ate a lot and purged all day. Today I’ve been inbetween with 250,500, and maybe another 100 calories. So ive had a total of 850 calories today and probably burned most of it with bowling and daily activities. I’m still hungry and look and feel fat. Im not sure if its bloating ir if I’m legitimately fat. It really ruins my self esteem. It gives me anxiety. It makes me feel depressed. I feel disgusted
I remember those days when I 'felt fat' and they were terrible. I still have those days but now I understand that it's the type of food I eat that causes that 'fat feeling' (aka bloating). I had a therapist long ago who, every time I said I "felt fat", she would say "Really? So 'fat' is a feeling?" She was trying to get me to understand that how my body felt was not what I was feeling. She tried her best to get me to my actual feelings - as you say, anxious, depressed, disgusted, etc. - but I never understood what she was trying to do. Anyway, if you are not working with a therapist I would urge you to do so. Working with a nutritionist may help you too so you can see that eating fewer calories during the day can actually give you that bloated feeling (yeah, I didn't believe that when I was first told it). Not getting proper nutrition affects every part of your body so please do consider working with a therapist before you do irreversible damage.