I miss my eating disorder a lot right now. I'm sick of using cutting as a way of coping with everything going on in my head. I liked being anorexic better. I wish I still had the self control and willpower to be anorexic but I've become lazy and weak. I miss the feeling after I successfully starved my self for a day. I miss the lightheaded dizzy feeling whenever I stood up. I miss my bones sticking out. Thats it. Tomorrow I am restricting my calories again. I am going to stop cutting and start starving.
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