Eating Disorders Support Group
Eating disorders are marked by an obsessive need to control the intake and/or purging of food. This community is dedicated to those struggling on the road to recovery. Join to discuss your experience with others and find support. Get advice, ask questions, and meet others who are going through similar struggles.
Friends, today has been terrible. ED aside, my husband was laid off today. We just had the best vacation ever - no binging or purging, I ate healthy but not overly restrictive - and then the morning after we got home, he lost his job. I can't eat at all. The hunger pains almost feel comforting. I know in my head how screwed up this is, but I can't help but feel like this is my penance for last week. I want to cry but I can't let my husband and kids see this, especially right now. I need to be the strong one and they think I am, but I'm barely hanging in there. I am just hoping all these negative feelings will pass, and I'll get a grip again, at least enough to carry everyone through this. I can't talk to anyone else about this. My friends and/or family would do some sort of intervention, and while they have good intentions, we just cannot do that right now. This is my only outlet, the only place I can say what I can't tell anyone else. Please be here for me. I just need to know someone out there knows how I feel and that I'll get through this. I just want to know I'm not alone. How do you come back from your low moments?
(I want you to know I am not suicidal; I just don't know where to go from here. I feel so stuck and hopeless.)
When you say "I can't help but feel like this is my penance for last week" and I am so sorry that this is your thought process. So often I have felt like I am "paying the price" for something bad I must have done in a previous life. Like Karma is getting me back. It's a thought process that speaks to a lot of deep pain within you. I assure you that your happiness is not the trigger for bad things to happen in your life.
I know you feel you must be the strong one in your family right now but that shouldn't mean that you have no outlets for your own feelings. Come here and vent to us. Write in your journals. Get a therapist who can help you through this difficult time in your life. Go for a drive by yourself and cry and scream in anger. Go for a walk and cry. It's not just important that you not give into the ED it's also important that you get to express your emotions and feel heard (when possible). I do feel you will get through this. It sounds like you have had to get through a lot in your life and that makes you a survivor. And survivors, survive. You can do this but please don't try to do this alone. ((Hugs))
My ED gets triggered when I’m sad or stressed out. It’s actually happening right now, so I can relate.
You’re not alone and we’re here for you! This is my favorite place to vent as well. My friends and family don’t really understand and often times try to convince me to eat if I tell them what’s going on so I don’t as much anymore. I’m seeking treatment but I’m not really engaged right now. Treatment is crazy scary though especially if you don’t want to stop restricting, which was me a few months ago and a bit again now. I won’t tell you to seek treatment or tell anybody. All I want you to know is we’re here for you and we understand. Prayed for you <3