Eating Disorders Support Group
Eating disorders are marked by an obsessive need to control the intake and/or purging of food. This community is dedicated to those struggling on the road to recovery. Join to discuss your experience with others and find support. Get advice, ask questions, and meet others who are going through similar struggles.
ok, so since the 9th i have been relapsing. (i have BED) i haven't been bingeing every day, but often enough. and i've had a TON of migraines lately, which has only made the cycle of ED worse. i will binge one day or maybe a couple days, then not want food at all. right now, i'm in the "please don't make me eat" stage of things. it's so freaking wierd! i'll go from eating CONSTANTLY and hiding food in my bedroom to just...not wanting to eat.
my migraines make both "phases" of this worse because they last for HOURS-sometimes even days. very few meds work. often, i'll have to take a combination of meds for a single migraine, and then sleep. even then, they linger. the intense pain they cause makes me not want to eat because my migraines are light sensitive.
migraines have caused me to miss out on a lot. everything from my high school's playoff-winning football game (in which we ended our biggest rival's 20+ year winning streak against us.) to my 16 year old brother getting baptized. missing these once-in-a-lifetime events seriously upsets me and often triggers a binge.
i just feel like this is a never-ending nightmare. i have been very dishonest with my friends who expect blogs when i struggle like this. (it is much easier for me to write my feelings vs. talk them out.) i have skipped blogging the last 3 or 4 times i've binged then avoided food. but how can i tell my best friends how much this hurts? how can i let the people who would do anything in the world for me know that i feel like a pendulum (spelling?) swinging between two equally horrific sides of hell? they know and they are praying. but they are worried enough already. i can't possibly burden them with this-not again. my best friend jenny is already terrified i'll get diabetes or something. god, now i'm crying. i'm so sorry. i really didn't mean to get this personal on the board. it just happened...it always does when i write.
that's another thing...i'm taking a mail order writing class. i've been enrolled since october, but haven't turned in a single assignment because i have been so focused on trying to get better. what am i supposed to tell my teacher? "i'm sorry, ms. professional author who i don't know from eve, but i haven't turned in homework because i have an eating disorder?" no! i can't! how could i possibly explain that? dear god, i am so scared! this is bad! the worst my ED has been since i started dealing with it in april. please pray. i need it desperately. thanks for reading this novel-sized post.-fallon
my migraines make both "phases" of this worse because they last for HOURS-sometimes even days. very few meds work. often, i'll have to take a combination of meds for a single migraine, and then sleep. even then, they linger. the intense pain they cause makes me not want to eat because my migraines are light sensitive.
migraines have caused me to miss out on a lot. everything from my high school's playoff-winning football game (in which we ended our biggest rival's 20+ year winning streak against us.) to my 16 year old brother getting baptized. missing these once-in-a-lifetime events seriously upsets me and often triggers a binge.
i just feel like this is a never-ending nightmare. i have been very dishonest with my friends who expect blogs when i struggle like this. (it is much easier for me to write my feelings vs. talk them out.) i have skipped blogging the last 3 or 4 times i've binged then avoided food. but how can i tell my best friends how much this hurts? how can i let the people who would do anything in the world for me know that i feel like a pendulum (spelling?) swinging between two equally horrific sides of hell? they know and they are praying. but they are worried enough already. i can't possibly burden them with this-not again. my best friend jenny is already terrified i'll get diabetes or something. god, now i'm crying. i'm so sorry. i really didn't mean to get this personal on the board. it just happened...it always does when i write.
that's another thing...i'm taking a mail order writing class. i've been enrolled since october, but haven't turned in a single assignment because i have been so focused on trying to get better. what am i supposed to tell my teacher? "i'm sorry, ms. professional author who i don't know from eve, but i haven't turned in homework because i have an eating disorder?" no! i can't! how could i possibly explain that? dear god, i am so scared! this is bad! the worst my ED has been since i started dealing with it in april. please pray. i need it desperately. thanks for reading this novel-sized post.-fallon
just please know you are not alone.... Im struggling too, but fighting...
have you tried getting migraine medication?
friends that dont have what you have cant understand, but they are your friends, so they are going to be there and support you as much as they can. i feel like you feel, swinging on that pendulum.
like Ziporah said, explain to your teacher that it was really stressful personal problems going on, and try to get the due dates extended. im praying for you. sorry for the insanely long answer.
-angela
If you have a close support, Develop a food plan, and Ask God with all you heart and strength for help to follow it tomorrow,
You can do this. but the paradox is , when we admit we cant do it, we can get some new strength and pwoer to overcome.
Just one day at time. DOnt wallow in the past couple weeks of relapsing, just start over and by faith, You can get one day! and then give thanks at the end of the day! and then take the next day///
You can rise above this and start fresh! I do OA