Eating Disorders Support Group
Eating disorders are marked by an obsessive need to control the intake and/or purging of food. This community is dedicated to those struggling on the road to recovery. Join to discuss your experience with others and find support. Get advice, ask questions, and meet others who are going through similar struggles.
I have been doing really well this past week. I have been exercising less and eating a bit more. I have actually eaten more calories than I have burned 3 days this past week, which is great for me. I have gained a little and I am not freaking out. I am staying positive and motivated and just focusing on eating what I plan and not skipping. Yeah!
However... the more I think about the support that I have received this week, the more angry I feel that my parents have not said anything to me. My one friend and my supervisor have shared with me the concerns that people have brought to their attention about my emaciated look. One coworker actually had requested to change schedules so she did not have to work with me as she was worried that I would just die at work. I learned this week that although I thought I looked great, everyone else thinks I look horribly ill. They made me believe and as hard as that is to hear, I believe them. But if I look so sick, why did my parents, who are supposed to love me, have never said a thing? I see them almost every day. If it was my daughter that looked deathly ill, I would say SOMETHING to her.
I don't want to sound like I blame them, I don't. This is my problem not their's. I am 35 and made my choices, but I can't help but feel they let me down by not confronting me. My boss confronts me but not my own mother? Here I thought I looked so good and my friend says I don't. He was so concerned that he almost called my parents. Has anyone else felt like this? I don't know if I have a right to be angry or if I am being selfish. Again, ED is not their problem, it's mine. I guess I just wished they would have told me how ill I looked and not let me go on thinking I looked fantastic.
However... the more I think about the support that I have received this week, the more angry I feel that my parents have not said anything to me. My one friend and my supervisor have shared with me the concerns that people have brought to their attention about my emaciated look. One coworker actually had requested to change schedules so she did not have to work with me as she was worried that I would just die at work. I learned this week that although I thought I looked great, everyone else thinks I look horribly ill. They made me believe and as hard as that is to hear, I believe them. But if I look so sick, why did my parents, who are supposed to love me, have never said a thing? I see them almost every day. If it was my daughter that looked deathly ill, I would say SOMETHING to her.
I don't want to sound like I blame them, I don't. This is my problem not their's. I am 35 and made my choices, but I can't help but feel they let me down by not confronting me. My boss confronts me but not my own mother? Here I thought I looked so good and my friend says I don't. He was so concerned that he almost called my parents. Has anyone else felt like this? I don't know if I have a right to be angry or if I am being selfish. Again, ED is not their problem, it's mine. I guess I just wished they would have told me how ill I looked and not let me go on thinking I looked fantastic.
Beyond that - I know how disappointing it is to not have your parents notice and speak up. I'm an adult, but sometimes it seems so obvious to me that I'm struggling and I want my mother to say SOMETHING. We don't have good communication, so that contributes. I think she does notice, but doesn't say anything. I'm not sure if it's the same for your parents and I don't want to make any guesses about that since I don't know you or them well.
I'm glad that you're staying positive overall. Sounds like you've done a lot of hard work. Good self-care! Keep it going :)
I wish I could tell you why... I think most of the time we felt we just couldn't help her... maybe your family feels that way too...