I am with you in prayer. Today I have been writing down scriptures pertaining to temptation to help me fall back on when I quit.
God is with you to help you and I in quitting. We are accountable for our own chices that we make but can not force others to make the same. My husband and I are both smokers to and suffer from copd. It has been either one or the other that falls when we try to quit and then we both start back up. This is one very horrible addiction but I believe that have the battle is getting a solid mind set to quit.
Does your wife have to smoke in the house? She can chose to keep on smoking but if she would be willing to go outside to do it then that would help alot. For me and my convictions wedding vows go all the way unless you are being physically abused and I mean abused not as a way to get out of a marriage you no longer want to be in. God is bigger than your wife and He will deal with her if you give her to Him and trust Him to work. She was very insensitive to you to say what she did at the dr's. Does she really suffer from mental illness because smoking does raise your seritonin in the brain to help with depression. Is she on perscribed med's for her mental health issues?? If so maybe you could talk with her dr. concerning your situation and he could help by intervening for you on her smoking outside.
We will beat this thing soon through God and will stand in victory over it. Do you have church support or other christians that can help you , also maybe your dr. can help with other support people and methods. You first have to really decided that you want to do this for you, and then go for it.
I am talking to myself here too!!! You are not alone in this and I will try to support you in prayer and words as I too am getting ready to take this step. I can not fail at this any more !!!! hugs. connie

It's not just the physical health we are in financial ruin because of the money spent on marijuana. We both get social security checks. She thinks that her check is hers to do with what she wants she spends every bit of it on marijuana. She will only pay the cable bill because I don't care for TV and refuse to. That leaves me to pay everything else and I don't have enough to cover everything. I can't sleep worrying about what to do. It's 4 AM and I haven't slept. Another example this is Jan. and we both have to pay our deductible on our prescriptions. I told her from the beginning of the month she had to keep enough money for hers. Tues. morning we went to get her meds she didn't have the money. I gave her the money I had saved for my meds on Friday. Now I have to borrow money or not get my meds for another week. Upon arriving home she pulled out a bag of marijuana and she said "I can see quitting cigarettes but there's no harm in marijuana'' This 15 minutes after finding out that I can't get my medicine for a week because she spent the money. This will definitely put me in the hospital and could possibly kill me; but it's not a problem??? Married couples should work together in everything as a team. I know she is mentally ill but even mention that or counseling and you have a fight on your hands. If I was to have her declared mentally unfit to handle her money, as she is,she would divorce me. I talked to social security and they said if I move out she could get about the same as I do. I have been thinking about moving out for awhile, then if she wants to buy weed instead of pay bills she can smoke it in the cold and dark. The dr. has talked to her about smoking outside she says nothing but laughs about it " That second hand smoke stuff is BS "she says. From the time I got out of the hospital until just a few months she stole my pain medicine every single month. I have to count my pills every day. She says she takes her vows seriously and has never broken them because she has never cheated sexually. I think she believes that is all there is to it. To get marijuana she has pulled every dirty trick imaginable. She lies, steals from me which is stealing from the marriage. She doesn't believe this is breaking vows.
Well here it is almost 6 AM. Another long lonely night. My Pastor told me last summer that I should leave, that she is married to the drugs not me.I know that God will take care of it in the end But what do I do now? If stealing pain medicine from a cancer patient isn't physical abuse what is? And the mental abuse is affecting me physically..

I am so sorry to hear this, My husband and I have been sick with upper resipitory in fection for the last 2 weeks and the antibiotics didn't touch it. My head is pounding all the time from coughing. She is addicted to drugs just as we are to smokes only she is stealing from you. She needs to get help but has to make that choice on her own. I fyour pastor is a true bible believer and not into compromise as that is happing in the church to day, i would seek him out and the lord for guidance. I would always go to the scriptures and ask God to show you what to do and not do anything until He has shown you. Right now you are responsible for your relationship with Him on your own and are accountable for your own actions as are all of us. If you are sincere and are doing all that you can to quit your own addition then He will make a way for you to do that and a place to do it if being at home isn't possible. I can not advice you on whether you should leave your wife or not because that is not my place. It is possible to seperate yourself from the situation if your are chosing to get free from your own addition of smokes and grow in the lord. He will take care of you and the situation if you trust and believe that He can. Not everyone will make it to heaven, the pathway is narrow and we all have to chose to follow Him not just accept Him and do our own thing in life. If you are at the point in your life that you are desiring a closer walk with Him ask Him what He wants you to do, He will show you!!! I will keep you in my prayers as this is totally in His hands. In His Mercy, connie

Wow I read your life situation for right now and it hit home personally because I so want and need to quit but its hard its a crutch ive had from age 12 present 43 to long, and I fear what i'm doing to my body, but I also share in your wifes extra curricular activity, and its daily and doesnt help with my fibro because I cant get prescribed what others get because of this spirit that has a hold on me. I see your faith and I commend you on all you put up with. I have faith but weak to that i read a web site about deliverance from smoking and I learned alot about strangefire and the queen of heaven all biblical, and its help me to know that i have to quit this is so not of God.
You pray for me and I''ll pray for you and especiallly your wife.

Thank you for your concern, It's 7AM and another sleepless night. I see my family doctor at 10AM. I've spent the last few days arguing about her drug habit. She says she wants to work things out ,that she has a plan. Will I listen? I say yes. The first thing out of her mouth is "I get so much a month for weed" I just say stop any plan that puts first the drug is insane. We are so far in debt now that we're on the verge of homelessness. I am seeing the doctor today because I have stomach pain and black tarry stools I know this is internal bleeding and I am afraid. When I told her about the app. she wanted to go with me I told her no I am going to see him about my health not to hear you try to glorify marijuana. She got angry said I just want to him behind her back. I am telling him only the truth. I'm just rambling so upset so tired God, help me do your will today.

I hope all went well today. You are in my thoughts. During your treatment, you must, MUST put your health first. Your wife, is stuggling with your illness as well and medicates herself with marijuana. Her problems are just that, HERS. You are not in any kind of place to let your mind focus on anyhing other then your own health. I suggest you start by lowering your stress level as much as you can. If you are physically able to participate in yoga class, go. Guided meditations for peace, health, positivity can be found all over the internet. I'm a urban hippy, but I think your mental energy should be on you. Good luck. You're in my thoughts.

Father God in Jesus Mighty Name I lift up belottsa to you and ask that you would help him to keep his eyes on you , for if he does he will always be in your most perfect peace. Lord , help him to give all these concerns to you and trust you with them. Lord, i pray that you will intervene in this situation with his health and his wife and finances . Lord I humbly ask that you will give belottsa a great desire to read your word and that your precious holy spirit will guide him to the scriptures that will bring strength , wisdom, peace,guidance, and hope. In Jesus Name I pray Amen!!!

Thanks again to all of you for your prayers and concern. I think that people with similar problems getting together and asking God for guidance is the only way we can solve life's seemingly impossible problems. Up to now I have spent a lot of time talking about my wife's problems, but as you said, Brooklynite, her problems are just that hers. I have a long road ahead working on the boatload of my own problems. I have so many that most of the support groups offered by DS apply to me. Helping others in need is one of the best thing I can do to help myself. As soon as I can find a place where I can relax and heal the first thing I,m doing is returning to the treatment center where I went in 1989 and again in '90. I don't have the money or insurance to admit myself {that would be a dream vacation for me} but am going to try to find some old contacts and maybe be a guest speaker for the current patients. Possibly, God willing, I may possibly do some counseling someday. I have hope again for one of the few times of my life. God bless you all.