People have their quirks. You probably have some that bugs him as well. It isn't you, it is simply his habit. And wet kisses? I breathe in through my mouth when I can while kissing, and breathe out of my nose so I am not breathing into their mouth. Not tons of tongue, either. That helps with a moist kiss that isn't sloppy, lol. And by the way, I hope you give your relationship some time before you get married. Believe me, as time goes on, you will see other things that bother you and it would be good to get these issues resolved now then after years of building resentment against them! It startles lots of people to have someone touch their face while they sleep. Best wishes.

Oh, too, maybe there is a hangup he has when he sees your dogs kiss you. I realize my last reply seemed a bit silly; you were married a long time before this so you know that you should take your time. It is really weird getting used to other's quirks, isn't it? Mine likes to be scratched...his back when we are sitting around, his head, when we are alone, and the inside of his arm lightly scratched...almost a tickle. He just soaks up the attention. He doesn't like me to reach up and touch his ears suddenly; especially if he is watching tv.

I call it: fear of touch . There will be no intimacy allowed here! Something is very DIRTY and it's not your kisses...it's his brain. Just think, humans love to be held...not him. The boy has a quirk alright. Now, please wait another 12 months before you claim loving this person. This is your ante speaking to you.

LOL! OK, I'm thinking about this . . . .I just ate a doughnut and after licking and licking my lips (kind of the end result of cleaning all the doughnut off from the top of my mouth), my lips are really wet and I want to (and did) dry them off. Would I ever dry my mouth off after being kissed? I don't know and don't remember if I ever have.

I think, for me, it would definitely depend on the manner in which the lips were dried off. If it is a quick, with the back of the hand, drying off, to me that would say 'gross, get this wet off of me' which would absolutely hurt. If it were kindly, gently done with a napkin or, say, forefinger and thumb, I don't think that would send the same message. . . . .

spiff....were you talking about scratching your dog in the second reply? I got confused.

Some people have adversions to stuff like that. My grandmother never ate or drank after anyone. It made her gag, she said she just couldn't help it. But before she would kiss any one of us good bye she licked her lips and gave us a wet one on the mouth. I never could figure that one out LOL.

If it bothers you a little now it may bother you a lot later. Take it easy

Oh, this thread is absolutely cracking me up!!!

justspiffy . how do you know if she's got a dog?

just spiffy, I hope you're talking about your dog!

LMAO!!!

Hey girl, take it easy. Get to know him before you jump the gun. If the numbers are right, you must have married while still in highschool. Enjoy life and all the freeedom it can offer. What seems like a small thing now, could blow up into a big issue later on. So just take it easy and enjoy life. You do not need to prove to anyone that you can get a man this quick. I have been separated almost 4 years and divorced 8 months (yea for freedom) enjoying every nanosecond of it. Go out there and explore life and everything it has to offer.

I had the most wonderful boyfriend in college but his kissing was way too wet for me. Oh how I tried to like him but the sloppy kissing did me in. I even tried to teach him - oh the poor soul to put up with that from me - but it was to no avail. We broke up over wet kissing:)

My older sister had a bf one time that she really liked EXCEPT for the fact that she said "he kisses like a vacuum cleaner" - Now I've never kissed or been kissed like a vacuum cleaner nor do I have the desire to pucker up to my Electrolux and give it a shot just to see what that might be like BUT I will say this:

If you don't BOTH ENJOY all manner of kissing, I'm with tobywinn. Something is rotten in Denmark. Kissing is the prelude to all things sexual and if "first base" isn't agreeable to either one of you, my gut is telling me that before too long, it's going to be something else...and then something else.

I have not seen you here before and haven't read your profile, either, but some of the responses indicate that this guy may very well be your "first" post divorce and following a long term marriage. I sewed plenty of wild oats BEFORE I got married, so they're all gone at this point. I knew I didn't have to prove anything to anyone once I got divorced and turned down plenty of offers during the 18 months it took to GET divorced.

So, if this kissing and touching issue is enough to bring you here for advice, it says to me that IN YOUR GUT you know something definitely isn't right in the relationship. Keep in mind the old adage "Act in haste; repent in leisure" -- you've got all the time in the world and there are lots of good, available men out there. Don't settle for the first one that came along!

Hugs to you.

She posted about her lovable dogs in her profile....just sayin'....

Seriously... if you have issues kissing, and you don't like his behavior, there must be something else going on. If you were married 20 years, and you are 47, you got married young, and I would think that you have not been making out with guys in the last twenty years. Doesn't matter, this is abnormal if no one else wants to say it. you said he wants to marry you, do you want to marry him? IF you have to ask us, then there is some bigger questions going on? What else is there?

Does he have some OCD issues with cleanliness? Who know, all I can say you better get to the bottom of this. I don't know is not a good enough, answer, he knows. AND there are people that don't like to kiss. For me, if he is not a good kisser... well, back in the pond he goes! For some reason I can not get the idea of you have may have to kiss a few frogs before you kiss a prince comes to mind. That may be what that means. AND good advicefrom all, and mine is talking about marriage after a 6 months of dating.. RED FLAG!

MsTerey you wrote: "...and mine is talking about marriage after a 6 months of dating.. RED FLAG!"

DISCLAIMER: PLEASE READ!
The following are just my thoughts and observations. Take 'em or leave 'em and no need to explain.

You are wise to use caution here, BUT "talking about marriage" isn't necessarily GETTING married! I would think, depending on your respective ages, talking about the future (whether together or separate) is realistic. When you are 20, 6 months isn't very long. But when you are 50, hey, we all know that we're not going to live forever! It just mentally shortens the way we think about things.

Now I am NOT SAYING that because you are 50-something that you need to RUSH INTO ANYTHING. No no no! But I wouldn't consider "talking about marriage" a red flag UNLESS there exists a huge disparity in YOUR ages, assets, and/or level of income. I actually think that broaching the subject of marriage is realistic, important and healthy in a relationship of 6 months between two people in their 50's. It would be an opportunity to evaluate where the relationship stands and where it may go. It would open the floor for other important discussions, as well.

Unless MARRIAGE is clearly not an option for you (would put an end to your alimony?) or you really have no intention of marrying this guy now or any time in the near future (say within the next 5 years), talking about it is a good thing. IF you have been up front with him since DAY ONE, clearly stating your intentions (or your NO WAY JOSE''s) if you cut him off at the knees for opening the discussion, then he very well may construe what that the previous 6 months, he has been USED -- or worse yet, "strung along." Nobody likes to feel either of those things! And it could permanently damage the relationship.

Good luck with this!

Whoa... My statement was not clear..." and good advice from all, should have said.. and mine ( meaning my advice) if he is talking about marriage after 6 months of dating.. RED FLAG! I meant smiley face and the kisser. Not me.

As to me. My life and my relationship is great. No one is being used, he or me! Our relationship is wonderful! BUT.... maybe good advice for someone who wants to get married again! I typed above right before I went to bed because I left my computer on, and was obviously in a hurry! I aplogize that " mine" did not mean my BF!

Seriously, there is nothing worse than feeling REJECTED AND UGLY in a committed relationship whereby your mate has issues of accepting you and your body. I agree with Ms Terey, there is a real need to get down to the real nitty gritty of his quirky tendencies. A healthy relationship is a successful relationship only when both sides can GIVE and receive loving behaviors. I stress the ability to "give" because if this guy does have a disorder, it prevents his ability of doing so, which ends up with talks of promises. We all know that sad story. You must be proactive in your decisions.

I agree with Ms terry and tobywinn, really what is a the hurry?? i can see more so when you are younger because if you hat childern the biological clock is ticking but what is the hurry in your 50s ?? to me the qualtiy of the realtionship and that includes kissing is more important then a title and a piece fo paper. Been there done that got the t shirt and it sucked. I agree wth Ms Terry if he cant kiss and doesntr float my boat throw him back its an illusion. To me what an insult to wipe my kisses off wet or not my opinion(looser) Ya know the book and movie : HE IS JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU Take heed. Best of luck to you