I am in a relationship with a wonderful man for one year and 1/2 now. He has gone thru the same thing I have gone thru only maybe not exactly in the same way. We have so much in common but there are things that are beginning to bother me. I dont know if they are red flags or things that can be settled or maybe its just me that I am getting to paronoid with things since the trauma I have suffered with my ex. He is close to his family but has two sisters that seem very intrusive in his life. That is just one thing. They call him constantly and want to know his whereabouts almost as if they have no life of their own. They are both married but like they dont let him grow up and have a life. His first wife took him far away to Georgia to live to take him away from the family. I dont want to separate him from his family. I get along with them all but it becomes really annoying at times and i dont know if i can handle that when and IF we were to get married. Then there's the ex wife I am concerned about. Although he says I should not be concerned I am. She is in Georgia but she is a really mean horrific woman who curses him out at times really bad. I cant stand the drama and I dont want her in his life at all after his divorce is finally finalized. I dont think they should be having any contact if its over its over. His kids are grown and they are 20 yrs old twin boys who are in college. If they need anything they have cell phones and they can call their father. She should NOT be in the picture at all. This is what happened to me in the past. She was in the picture and there was contact through the son who is 32 and thats how they got back together and my ex is with is ex in Florida. So far distance didnt separate them. I have no contact with my ex at all. My kids call him and I dont know anything else. I believe when you divorce and its over ITS OVER. It is done!!!!!!!! So thats another issue. Right now he is living with his parents in NJ and i live in the Bronx. He has already processed the divorce papers and we are just waiting. I think sometimes he really knows what he wants. He says if he didnt want to marry me he would have not even started the divorce process and I so want to believe him. He treats so good and is so attentive to me and is always with me when he gets a chance. We see each often. He sends me flowers he is excellent but I am letting these things bother me. He says once the divorce is finalized it is a matter of months but then he says he wants to save 5,000 as a cushion; he wants to wait until January of next year, and I feel sometimes he is just stalling. What is he afraid of? Is he not sure or is it me? I even stopped giving him sex because I think I was making it too easy for him. And if he wants to do it right then marry me. He said that was fine. I am moving out of my apartment next month. Will not be renewing my lease. Moving in with a male friend who is doing me the favor until i can save for another apartment. My boyfriend is not happy with this arrangement and now says he will have to step up to the plate. Oh well; am i suppose to put my life on hold until YOU feel you are ready or what? I am tired of the long rugged road and the waiting. I will not pressure no man into marrying me so he can throw that in my face in the future should we have an argument of some kind but really now. Does he want to or not marry me? What do you think?