Many questions have to be answered

Why did you divorce
Are you able to get past your problems
Was divorce amicable
do you still love her

Cynical side of me would ask

what does she want
is she broke
did she not get what she wanted in the divorce
why now
what has changed in her life that she wanted divorce before but not now

I would probably not answer her, will she chase you. Will she show you what's changed

We divorced because she never forgave herself for getting pregnant.
Counseling will hopefully help us resolve our past problems.
It was amicable, but still very difficult.
I do still love her.

She wants us to reconcile.
She is not broke.
She got what she wanted in the divorce.
She still loves me.
She said she realizes I wasn't the cause of her unhappiness.

I agreed to meet her for counseling.

Yes, go to counseling and do not move in together until some work is done first. Your counselor can guide you. This is great news! Best of luck to you

You can try with a lot of counseling. Take your time and don't jump back into this. Think of your children even though they are older. I hope this will work for you

I agree with the others -- therapy/counseling for BOTH of you. Individually at first, then together. Use extreme caution, my friend. Listen to what she's NOT saying and you may find an underlying motive for this "grand gesture."

I appreciate your thoughts.

Wow.....its amazing how time changes things. If my ex had said this to me a few months ago, I'd have jumped at the chance. Now....I just cringe at the thought.

Good luck in whatever you decide to do.

Wow, I can't imagine how stunned you must be. I think you're the only one that's going to know if this is right for you or not, but like the others, I wish for you to think of yourself first. The split was hard enough the first time, and, presumably, for a reason. No one goes through a divorce if they don't have to.
If you think the work to try and reconnect and rebuild trust is worth it, best of luck to you both. I hope whatever you choose brings quality and serenity to your life.

I've agreed to go to counseling at the church that we went to together. It's with the same preacher that I
went to 2 years ago.

I was surprised to hear her say she wants to reconcile. But when I look back at our marriage
and our life together. It was pretty good.

This is great news !!!! I hope it works out !!! I think its way better then the heartbreak of divorce. Keep us up to date of how its going

This is good news but like the others have said,be careful. I hope with the counselling things work out for you. I tried to get back together with my ex but with her past infidility it was just too much to work through.I'm glad you don't have that issue to deal with.

I say yes go to counseling together. If she is sincere and does still love you, then there may be real hope of reconciliation. I would've done anything for my ex to tell me he wanted to reconcile. I wish you all the best!

If you feel inside that this is what you want, then go for it. You know that you will put everything you have into it, but you're not sure your wife will do the same. I guess you won't know until you try. I think it's worth a go, especially as there was no infidelity or abuse.

The only red flag I see here is that she refused to go to counselling before. That's a sign of someone who thinks they don't have a problem - that it's the partner who has the problem. Maybe she has realised she needs help and that would be a good thing.

All the best, wiseman.

love and hugs
kamary

Wiseman...since she is willing to go to counseling...that will make all the difference...it will help you both come to a genuine decision based on personal needs. Reconciliation can work...I personally know of 2 couples who have done just that. One couple was divorced for 7 years...they went to individual counseling and then couples counseling. They are very happy and have remarried...that was 6 years ago. Good luck with this wiseman...I will be praying for you both...Big Hugs...Kathy

It's nothing personal, but rather an issue of performance. I'd require a home security deposit and an early-termination fee deposit upfront . It would include a legal engagement agreement contract regarding altercation, battle, brawl, clash, collision, combat, conflict, contention, disagreement, discord, dispute, fight, fracas, fray, skirmish, squabble, struggle, wrangle. There would be the added proof of burden on her part to give an engagement ring to YOU as the condition of your acceptance of HER implied proposal of a relationship . There would also be a 6 months probation period requiring her compliance and completion a full program with proof of certification from a licensed marital therapist. Get my point. Her efforts is the proof of how much is she willing to work her for you.