I know how you feel. This is also my 1st Easter without my husband since we have been separated since August. I survived all the other major ones - Thanksgiving the hardest since it was the first major one after separation. I dreaded Christmas but after Christmas dinner which I had early I went to a men's homeless shelter to serve dinner. I knew no one there but found out about it by joining a volunteer meetup.com group. I had a wonderful time for a few hours. I met nice volunteers and the men were so grateful and clapped for us who came to serve them dinner. It was so different but I tried to think about how I am lucky compared to some other people and not feel sorry for myself. I also get depressed like you but attended various support groups, go to a therapist, read books about healing after divorce and of course, like you, love the people here at DS for their support and love. After the holiday is over, you will start to feel better until the next one but it is all normal. I also used to go to the mountains with my husband to a fancy cabin where his whole family met each Easter. I definitely will miss those Easters as I love his family but now I barely hear from them. It hurts but I know I can't change what happened to me and am desperately trying to see how his leaving me after 34 years may be a very good thing for me. Take care of yourself and if you can try to do a volunteer activity or join a meetup to be with people this Sunday. My divorce support group does a potluck for every holiday for those who are alone or a single parent. I went to a potluck on my 1st holiday with the husband and had a nice time even though I was grieving very badly at that time. I am so sorry that this happened to you and it is so new for you but it does get better a little over time. I am still moving forward but it is not an easy road. I will think about you this Sunday and hope you do something so you are not alone. Post on this site if you get sad.

Hugs to you and Happy Easter to you and everyone who reads this,
Donna

I meant that I went to the potluck Thanksgiving which was the 1st holiday WITHOUT my husband, not with him.

Hello,
First of all , I’m sorry that your going through this .
I know that it’s very..very difficult .
Your present situation is very similar to what happened to me 7 years ago. Wife left .......friends and family turne their backs on me or left me for good . My x family (Like you ) they were my whole family to ....for 40 years ... So.................. It’s just not easy . The good news is (You can’t see it right now) but, someday you will feel better..........takes time .
NOW.WHAT CAN YOU DO / ADVICE ........................
Well................ You want to get out and get all the help that you can .......... Church, Therapist , support groups . Check your local hospital many of them have support groups/classes .
I joined a (Meet up group) a little after my x left . You can go on the internet and find one . At lest I got out a little .. Even if it’s for an hour or so.....
Stay here on D&S....... It’s one of the best support places to be .
Here you’re going to find people that are going through or have been through what you are going through right now.
These people (Including myself) are not going to think your crazy......... Are not going to tell you to get over it ..........stop crying .... We’ve sll been there. WE KNOW ....... You can write whatever you want .... Express all your feelings .............. Journal. Leave messages . It’s an important place to be for you right now.... I’ve been around for...............OH !!!! 6 years now . I’ve met so many good people and you will also..
Here on D&S .well...............It’s like a club where we all help each other........
With that said ............I have to go ..................
So. MY new friend !!!!!!!! Take care of yourself ........
God Bless................
Timeman...................... Bob
Sciteacher--------------- Good morning to you ............. Be strong !!!!! Better days are coming !
Bob

Holidays are very hard. Thanksgiving and Christmas were jus another day for me. Thedaughter and Sil I live with worked and I didnt want to go over to her inlaws. Is there anywhere you can go even for a few hours.it will get better over time.

Just focus on this holiday and don't worry about the others just yet. You know that saying about how to eat an elephant? One bite at a time. Sciteacher is right, they are all difficult, but you can get through them. I like what she did, she got the focus off of her and onto doing for others. As far as your friends, that is also normal. Friends wait until the dust settles or they wait until you come to them. (((HUGS)))

This is also my first holiday. Stbx left 6 1/2 weeks ago. My children and I are a bit lost. My big problem is that my 2 best friends from childhood are married to his brothers, holidays were always family. Now the family is in tatters. My best friends are still my best friends but what is going to happen at holidays. I spent holidays with these women long before any of us ever met the brothers and I just don't know how this is going to work.
I do like some of the above advice given above.

I’m coming in on this late, so I’d like to know how you made out? I know that it’s hard – especially if you do not have any family of your own. I’m so sorry that it’s so hard like that. I have my girls and I do have a brother and a sister – neighbors that are like family who always share holidays together. We have been doing it for years, and it didn’t stop when my ex left.

This year we went out instead of cooking and I was disappointed, but at least we were together and there was no clean up. So that’s a good thing.

I'm coming in late on this as well. In time these feelings will pass. Although your family dynamics have changed you still have your family. I did not miss my old traditional Easter this year because the kids and I have created new ones...these new ones are 5 years old now...they have overcome the old ones. I still have my family and our bonds are stronger now than they ever were...I had a wonderful Easter dinner with the kids and extended families...in all honesty...the new traditions are so much better than they old ones...no stress...just happiness and contentment and the kicker...everyone gets along and lots of love and hugs are shared.

Its really hard for the first couple of years...a lot of adjusting has to happen. In time though...like me and many other old timers...you will find your way through and come out the other end happier than you ever thought you would be...just hang in there and do what ever you need to do for your healing...honour your feelings and work through them. Better days are coming...I promise you that...Big Hugs...Kathy

I realize you're so new into this... not even a year. I'm 3 years divorced and still have a hard time coping. I wonder and think about my old family and all...then I catch myself and FORCE myself to think of my NEW traditions. It's hard. You want to dwell on all those years of traditions and families. My soul wants to hang on for dear life...but I have to open my eyes and see what's in front of me NOW. I still have my S and D. They still need me in their life. They know the dynamics have changed and I don't want to let them down. I strive to make sure the holidays are "different". One year we had a picnic with hot dogs and chips on the beach for Christmas Day! Lol... my parent were with me and my D and my dad said, "Hes never had a Hot Dog any better!" YOU have to try very hard. I know exactly where you are at. Praying for you!

I too just went through my first holiday without the stbx, well not including X-mas day when I found everything but we had already visited with family at that point… I did well actually I just distracted myself playing with the kid's and whatnot but it was my family so that was probably a big help… My big test is coming up with our 13th wedding anniversary coming up (20 yrs 6 months together), May 1st. Normally I would have started planning something this week, well let the count down begin….