I've been to the emergency room by ambulance twice. I had minor out patient surgery and then spent two days in the hospital for blood clots in my lungs from the minor procedure I had done. All of that within 30 days.

I took a $45.00 cab ride home the first time. The nicest ride home at three in the morning.

I have no family here and I live in a very rural area. My daughter made a ten hour drive for the surgery and to take care of the animals on this farm.Then a few weeks later I'm in the emergency room and admitted to the hospital. I was lucky the man who works for me once a week fed my horses for me. When they discharged me with no notice I was hunting a way home. Luckily the guy that helps me answered his phone and he picked me up and took me home.I could have taken another cab home if needed.

Sometimes you have to think outside what you are used to. Your sister or a cab would work.

I know exactly what you mean, it's so true. One learns that independence from singlehood quickly forces you to relinquish awkwardness to establishing "Who do you call in case of ER". You're learning we are not an island of ourselves nor we are so entirely self-reliant.

After divorce, I had relocated out of state not knowing a soul. I was just getting acquainted with a group of women at my local church when I ran a fever from an oral abscess. Of course, I was too proud to ask someone to drive me to Urgent Care for antibiotics as it progressively got worse. The experience of finding myself lying on the floor along my bed thinking "What am I doing here? I'm supposed to be in the bed! " taught me, as we mature, it's best to nip illness right away! Since then, an "accountability" system was established with other single mature women.

I have a single friend that just emails everyone saying she needs a ride and someone helps. Not for everything just those medical appts where they don't allow you to drive home. I get what you are saying though. It's nice not to have to ask.

Toby is right, don't let pride get in the way of taking care of your health! Sure, you have to be independent now, and maybe it's something that you see as being forced on you, unwelcome, etc. But it's your reality. So.....sometimes, you are going to need people. You just WILL!

Ask yourself: Would I help a friend in need? If the answer is yes, then my bet is that the people connected to you - family, friends - would be of a similar mind! Family and friends are there in good times and in times of need. Make the request - and be thankful that you have good and kind people in your life. You are NOT alone! Good luck with your procedure, hope all goes well!

Treat yourself to some flowers and favourite comforts when you get home - you deserve it!

I sometimes think about this now that I'm on my own, and then I remember that I was often left to deal with things on my own in my marriage anyway. My mum often came to help when I needed someone back in those days.

I don't like having to ask people for help either. It's one of my foibles that I've had to get over since I've lived alone. I find that most people are willing to help if you ask them nicely and show consideration for their needs as well as show appreciation for what they do for you.

If no one happens to be available on the day you need them, it might be wise to tell your doctor. There may be other options available. For example, here in my home town in Oz, there are three organisations who have people available to transport people to and from hospitals, doctors appointments, dentists, hairdressers, the grocery store etc.

love and hugs
kamary

I paid someone to take me to a dental appointment and she was to spend the day at my home. It was some major dental work. The people I'm around are all very busy. While I will change my schedule to help someone they won't. Most of them own the horses I take care of. One did offer to help while I was in the hospital but when I asked about a ride home from the hospital she was too busy.

This town has taught me to be more independent than I already was. I can't afford to lose income because I need help getting home. It was that way in my family too.

Thanks guys. You all rock! Just knowing you've experienced this too and letting me vent helped, but the suggestions are great too. Have a wonderful evening. I'm having one of my new single events tonight-book club with some super intelligent and wonderful women.

I'm fortunate that I have a sister who lives about an hour from me, but I also have a few friends that I can call in emergencies.

I'm also one who hates to ask for help, but I have learned that you at least need an "emergency" person, because there could be a time you just need help. Remember, your health is always important.

Sending hugs!!!

cmonge...the first time I truly broke down after my stbx left, I was filling out the information sheet at a doctors office, I realized that I no longer had anyone to put as emergency contact. I cried like a baby. I needed to schedule an endoscopy and couldn't even schedule because I had to arrange a ride first....it's tough. It's not a thing most people think when they think divorce or separation.
You just need to surround yourself with a good support system. Don't neglect your health for your pride.

I experienced this even when my stbx was living in our house. Just 6 months ago, I broke my ankle. He dropped me off, and I had to hobble on crutches up to the doctor's office on the 26th floor. I was in tears by the time I got there (it was hard, even by elevator). I then had to call him, and wait for him back down on the first floor, for him to swing by in his car and pick me up. I had surgery 14 years ago on a Friday. He had several weeks notice. He got mad at me for having it on one of his clinic days. (He is a doctor) The day our first child was born, he made rounds in the hospital! Also 15 years ago, I had a miscarriage. I had to call my mother who lived in another state, to come and take me to the doctor for a D&C I was devastated!!!! Why did I stay 22 years?

The emergency contact has been a problem for me. The last ten years of our marriage the ex worked overseas. I didn't even bother to tell him when a horse sent me sailing out of a round pen and into a pine sapling. What could he do on the other side of the world? I already knew he wouldn't come home. His job came first.

When my youngest quit talking to me for three years I had to find another emergency contact. My riding instructor agreed to make decisions for me and was executor of my will.

Both of my daughters are getting better about answering their phones but the youngest is a nurse and works 12 hour shifts. She also lives in the next stateThe oldest lives three states away. I now put them both on as emergency contacts knowing that they may not answer their phones because they don't know who is calling.

I'm too far away from family to make any of them my emergency contact and they were estranged even when I was living in Maryland, so I had to get creative!

When I moved down here to Florida last year, I put my long time best friend (who also lives here) as my first contact and then my neighbor, who was more than happy to step up to the plate. When I did my face-plant in the kitchen in March, she drove me to the E.R. and checked in on me often the next few days.

If you go to church, you may find that there is a list of people who are willing to help others. My experience is the list of helpers is always longer than the list of those who need help. Give it a try.

Wow Beanie! That's sad. :(

Well the awkward moment movie is for you.. lol so I am also sharing the link with you

http://movie25.ws/that-awkward-moment-2014/