Dissociation Community Group
For anyone who experiences dissociation whether DDNOS DD or DID. Be aware that alters may post at anytime please be accepting of that!
I'm having a very difficult time dealing with my problems. I've asked plenty of questions, but it isn't helping the way I expected it to, so I've decided just to explain what happens with me and hope that someone can help.
I've always seen things that no one else does, there was no trigger or abuse that started it. The kind of things that I see can be very disturbing... I see a lot of shadowy things, but I think most people do. I see the things you would see in a horror movie. You know, like all twisted in ways they shouldn't be and making disgusting noises. I see people too, not as often, but I do. When these.. hallucinations know that I can see them, they do horrible things to themselves. They'd slice their arms open (which is a major issue for me because I had a cutting problem, and seeing things like that trigger the urge to do it again), or they'll hang themselves, things like that. I refuse to be in the dark because even if I can't see them, I can still hear them. Hearing them, but not seeing what their doing is absolutely horrifying.
Almost every night, I'll be laying in bed trying to sleep and I'll hear someone whisper my name in my ear. I can almost feel their breath on my ear... haha how cliche... I also hear people talking in my head. They comment on everything I say and do. It gets very annoying at times. There are five that I can distinguish, but there are more. Its like being in a crowded room and everyone is constantly talking and to hear a single one of them, you have to focus on just that one voice. Its very distracting too, I can barely concentrate on anything anymore because its gotten so bad.
There are times that I just absolutely cannot remember what I did. For example, I was with my boyfriend and he says I was acting really strange and said something like he can never touch me again. But all I can remember from that night was my mom yelling at me and then telling him I need to be more careful. I don't remember saying anything else, in fact, I don't even remember why my mom was yelling or how I ended up with my boyfriend.
I've been so anxious this past week trying to make sense of all this, but I honestly can't. I try to use the group for questions but I need more to go off... I feel like I'm losing myself, and losing touch with reality.
Posted on 03/09/13, 02:28 pm
I've always seen things that no one else does, there was no trigger or abuse that started it. The kind of things that I see can be very disturbing... I see a lot of shadowy things, but I think most people do. I see the things you would see in a horror movie. You know, like all twisted in ways they shouldn't be and making disgusting noises. I see people too, not as often, but I do. When these.. hallucinations know that I can see them, they do horrible things to themselves. They'd slice their arms open (which is a major issue for me because I had a cutting problem, and seeing things like that trigger the urge to do it again), or they'll hang themselves, things like that. I refuse to be in the dark because even if I can't see them, I can still hear them. Hearing them, but not seeing what their doing is absolutely horrifying.
Almost every night, I'll be laying in bed trying to sleep and I'll hear someone whisper my name in my ear. I can almost feel their breath on my ear... haha how cliche... I also hear people talking in my head. They comment on everything I say and do. It gets very annoying at times. There are five that I can distinguish, but there are more. Its like being in a crowded room and everyone is constantly talking and to hear a single one of them, you have to focus on just that one voice. Its very distracting too, I can barely concentrate on anything anymore because its gotten so bad.
There are times that I just absolutely cannot remember what I did. For example, I was with my boyfriend and he says I was acting really strange and said something like he can never touch me again. But all I can remember from that night was my mom yelling at me and then telling him I need to be more careful. I don't remember saying anything else, in fact, I don't even remember why my mom was yelling or how I ended up with my boyfriend.
I've been so anxious this past week trying to make sense of all this, but I honestly can't. I try to use the group for questions but I need more to go off... I feel like I'm losing myself, and losing touch with reality.
Posted on 03/09/13, 02:28 pm
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My 6mo twin DD's are EBF and just started rice cereal on the first. Everything has been going fine except this morning one of them had a diaper rash (lots of redness around her anus). I read this as one of the signs of an allergy. BUT I did just buy a different brand diaper yesterday (which they have used randomly before w/no issues). Do you think its the cereal or the diaper? Im ready to start...
I want you to note that these people you see are projections from your own head. Not reality.
When you see them, it's like dreaming with your eyes open.
A friend on another board had schizoaffective, and a cat...I pointed out to her that a dog would be a better pet. Why? The dog would NOT bark at hallucinations!
...Sort of a seeing-reality dog...
you should look up dr deborah king. she would help you.
from the people i know...some of them are into this kind of stuff and i learned a lot from them. i don't see things like you but i notice a lot of things. i think when you have difficulties, it keens up some of your other senses. i had a friend once who's third eye was wide open. i know this isn't the support group for this kind of thing, but maybe it will alleviate some kind of stress. once, when i was around 20 (that's like 18 years ago), i asked her about the voices she hears calling her name at night. and she wasn't bothered in the slightest. she said she just tells them to be quiet. and i think you're supposed to really declare that they leave or that they are not real. or change it up. declare you are safe and protected. it is from your head. it is a projection. but you can really take control of it.
look up deborah king. i hope you are okay!!!