Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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NeedUrHelp 08/11/2018

My depression is not going away. It feels like it's steadily building up inside of me wanting to get out. But I don't have anyone I can talk to about it, any close friends or family that I can tell how I feel. And I just need an outlet. Like I guess if I have some other pain to deal with I won't have to deal with the pain inside, that's my reasoning. I've never self-harmed before and I've heard it's addictive and I already have too many things I'm trying to give up to add this one to my plate. But I don't know what to do. I just feel like I should cut myself, just a little, so I can let the pain out. Then again I'm scared of hurting myself too badly, so thereat my catch 22. I'm sorry, I know this is a depression group but I've checked and I can't see a self harm group or I wouldn't have posted this here. I feel close to bursting with the pain I feel inside.

SimpsonsOK 08/11/2018

If you hit the magnifying glass at the top (just before the letter icon), and type in self harm, a bunch of groups will show up, including one specific to cutters. Glad you have also come to the depression group. You are certainly welcome here. This is a good group to join. Active and caring folks here. Comforting hugs.

cottontail 08/11/2018

so sorry that you are in so much pain. you are not alone though, we are all here for you. do you want to talk about what is causing you to feel so bad

NeedUrHelp 08/11/2018

Thanks Simpson, I've seen the group you mentioned. I'll consider joining it.

NeedUrHelp 08/11/2018

And thanks for the support. It's a lot of things, Cottontail. I'm just depressed about a lot of things. I can't seem to be able to connect with friends. I keep people at a distance. I don't feel good about myself, low self esteem and all that. So I'm kinda lonely.
I've done my CPAs and got a good job. But i quit last month because I couldn't cope with all the pressure at work. And now am worried about money on top of everything else.
Then I'm struggling with everything from insomnia to some addictions I can't seem to get rid of.
And then there is just the sadness that is just... there. I don't know why it's there it just is.
Too much information? Am sorry, I just have a lot on my mind right now. Thanks for listening though.

rosecandy 08/11/2018

First, please don't apologize for talking things through! This is as good a place as any (if not better in some cases) to sort out what you're thinking and feeling. Because a lot of us have been where you are and we can understand you more intimately, so talk/type freely and don't feel bad about it.

I understand what you mean about not wanting to add another addiction to your life. Smoking is my only real vice, and it's very hard to quit, but I'm trying so hard right now. It's especially hard when you're stressed and anxious. Please try to be strong and resist harming yourself. I find being creative in some way to be very cathartic. Do you have any creative hobbies, or any you've ever thought of picking up?

I'm sorry to hear that you're going through such pain, too. I'm always here for support.

NeedUrHelp 08/11/2018

I'll try not to apologize :)

I can relate about the trying to quit smoking. I'm trying to stop viewing pornography. But I find myself turning tonite more and more when I'm feeling low.

I do in fact enjoy knitting. Yesterday I knit my first sock ever and it fit and I was so proud of myself and happy. It did come out looking a bit funny but it was fun. Yes, that made me happy.

NeedUrHelp 08/11/2018

It's weird though.. doesn't matter how happy I feel during the day, come evening I'll still start feeling bad about myself and all the as feelings will come rushing in. Come morning when I wake I'll be fine again (mostly) but it's always worse as night draws near

SimpsonsOK 08/11/2018

This I can share on. On IP units, nurses were regularly checking rooms of depressed patients during free time. They would go in and find the drapes/curtains closed. and open them. Also would turn on lights. They said that depression feeds on darkness. Ever notice that on dark, rainy days, the depression likes to step it up. I have learned to watch out for whether I am keeping rooms light or dark. Guess I'm saying, it is not weird; it goes with depression. Comforting rainbow hugs.

NeedUrHelp 08/12/2018

Thank you all so much for being there. I'm feeling much better today :)

Gtb100 08/12/2018

I've been there and done it before. It is addicting. It starts at having urges to do so then I began doing it every chance I got. I then cut places I can hide like my thighs. I had to distract myself like play games, watch movies, leave the house to walk around or use sleeping aids to knock myself out.
Idk the best thing for you bc everyone is different. Listening to people on this site can be helpful

NeedUrHelp 08/12/2018

It is. I sometimes feel like I'm he only one going through stuff but here I can at least see that I'm not alone. Which is kind of a nice feeling.
I've been reading a novel all day, so that's been a welcome distraction. And I also watch movies and series as I knit to distract myself. Thanks Gtb100

AMaeSLove 08/13/2018

I am glad that you are feeling much better today. Depression is a very difficult battle to face, and it is much more of a struggle when one has nobody to talk with about their feelings and problems. But you are not alone in these dark times; we are all here for you, and we care.

If ever you feel the urge to hurt yourself again, you may let us know. And I'm willing to be there when you are in need of advice, comforting words, or just someone to listen. My inbox is always open.

MochaLova 08/13/2018

My advice would be to not start cutting at all. I’m an addict from over 4 years, I stopped for 3 but picked it back up at the beginning of the year.
Over the time I’ve learned a bunch of skills to fight it off, but it’s not easy. I completely understand why you’d feel this way, because I felt the same. If you do begin to feel urges, don’t fall into them. Instead (and I talk from personal experience) stay around your family, don’t go lock yourself in your room. Distract yourself, do something you enjoy like riding a bike, playing with the dog/cat, read a book, draw, etc.
You’re stronger than these urges, and don’t give up! We all believe in you

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