Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I have an excellent relationship with my mom but I have a really bad one with my stepfather. I have lived with my mom and stepdad for several years because of my health. I have been through a lot mentally with my stepdad and have finally found somewhere else to live. My mom is now not speaking with me. I told her I was moving out. She said this was out of the blue why didn't you ask my opinion. (I am 27 years old.) My mom said I told my friend that I was a slave. Not true, I told her that I would be happy not to cook anymore because its hard me because of my health. She said I shouldn't have told my friend who is letting me move in with her my problems, I just need someone outside the family to talk to. I didn't ask her to move in she asked me. I told my friend that I was planning to move in with my sister at first but that was up in the air and that if I got out of my parents house I would be all right since I was having bad thoughts. Like I said my friend offered, I even made sure she knew what she was getting into. I even said if you have second thoughts its fine. What did I do wrong? I am depressed anyway I was trying to find peace of mind but this is making it worse. Any advice would help? Am I in error?
Of course you did NOTHING wrong. It sounds like your mom is being unrealistic. You are 27 years old and you have every right to move out of your mom's house.
The only thing that I'm wondering about is how did your mom find out what you said to your friend?
Did your friend tell your mom????? If so, she should not have done that...............
Good Luck Sweetheart :-)
To be honest, from this post alone, she sounds somewhat like my mom...which worries me. I know you said here that you have an excellent relationship with her, but this response on her end seems emotionally bizarre. You did nothing wrong!
Please, I hope you still enjoy moving in with your friend. That could be an immense load off, from the sounds of it.
*HUGS*
Elle
It can be hard for parents to let go of their child, the final cutting of the apron strings if you will. Moving out can be that final act, and some parents see it as the end of being a parent.
The end of being a parent.
That is the rub. It is not the end, but rather it is a huge change in the roles. As parents we start out life in complete control of that small child we just welcomed into our life. Our relationship changes gradually; we cede control to our children in bits and pieces until such time as they are on their own.
What we have done is slowly changed from the "in complete control" part of parenting to being there "as a friend as an adviser" part.
Sorry to be so long here. Hope there is something here that hits your situation!