Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
Hi,
I am new to this site and to talking about stuff like this. I am 21 and I have been dealing with major depression/anxiety for about 10 years now. Lately I have been feeling really overwhelmed. My mom has been sick for the past 4 or 5 years with a disease similar to dementia, and while both my older brother and I are supposed to share the responsibility of handling her financials and health care, he checks out completely and leaves me to handle it all, while also trying to focus on taking 6 classes in university (which is already difficult since I have ADD) and working part-time. The past few months have been really difficult, I have felt really alone. My friends leave me out of most of their plans, or if I try to make plans they back tend to back out last minute. I broke up with my boyfriend, which was really difficult because he was the only person I trusted. I cannot focus on my schol work due to my ADD, which ends up giving my anxiety attacks that keep me up late at night, and in turn causes my depression to get worse.
At this point, I am not sure what to do, I feel so lost all the time. I have thought about just dropping out of school countless times because I feel like I just cant do it and that I am not cut out for it. The only stable thing in my life is my dad, because he is always there for me, but I sometimes feel like he does not get the way I am feeling. He often says that everyone feels this way, which with some of things I am dealing with is true, but I dont think that everyone feels as low as I do almost every day.
I guess if anyone has any advice or anything I would really appreciate it!
Idk if these services still exist now that they are cutting funding but maybe there's a state program that would pay for an aide to help you take care of your mom.
If you can't talk to your brother have you told your dad he is shirking his responsibility?
Idk if any of that is helpful.
It's not normal to feel that way and you deserve to be happy. Life shouldn't be one constant struggle. We can help each other out.
Good luck.
And your study is important.
If you have to jettison anything, try not to let it be the study. I say that because if you lose your shot this time around, it could be 20 yrs before you get another chance. That's what has happened to me, and it's happened to other people I know as well.
With the depression it can be hard to make a parent understand. I know my ex husband has no hope of understanding how my daughter feels. There would be no way to get it across to him, even though he loves her, because he's of a different generation, he thinks depression is 'feeling sad'. As in, feeling sad TODAY. "I saw you smile so you can't be depressed" kind of thing. Not a clue.
But counsellors can understand, and I really think you need one. My counsellor had my back. He was truly wonderful, and the person I could run to when things got to me who was always there, always listening, and actually genuinely cared. Also, I didn't think I was burdening him, or 'using him up' - because he was paid. So I felt like I had a right to talk. It really did help me.
Meantime for you though, we're here for you. You have so much on your plate, all the things you name that have happened are just awful. Any one of those things would upset me.
I am going to try counselling again. I am calling to try and set up an appointment with someone, I have done it three times already and none of them really helped, so I am hoping this time it does.
As for school, I try my best to get my work done, but sometimes I cant make myself do it and that is the worst part. I tried some medications but they either did not work or i had a very negative side effect and it was not worth the money to continue taking it.
Thank you guys so much, I really appreciate what you guys have said!