I wish I could take the fears away from you, if only for one trip. Sorry, I do not have any experience with this. All I can think to say is to call your therapist.

You have had three or four trips already with out any disasters the fear is real what ever you are afraid of is not. You have tested this fear and survived it is all in the mind.

Tell your-self the fear in reality in actuality the journey's have passed with out incident so the past has proved your fear wrong it is distorted thinking.

Today I will not be afraid of anything. If my mind is clouded by nameless dreads.

I will track them down and expose their unreality. I will remind myself I am in charge of my day and me, tell myself what happened yesterday, the past would not happen today.

This is a brand New Shinning day and I have it in my power to make it a good one by the way I want it and think it should be and what I choose to do with it fear free.

I will not be so ready to entertain fears of what might happen. If I concentrate on today

There will be no room in my mind for fret and worrying I will fill this day with good things and once this day is over I will look back and be satisfied that there was no fear.

We can choose to be brave; having courage doesn't mean that we are with out fear.

It means only that we decide to act in spite of these fears. We become scared of our own shadow we find things to make us afraid and worry.

Where can we find the courage we once had, it has to be buried somewhere deep down.

We have to face our fears, worries and challenge how real they are we tend to judge our fears from past experiences, or future things we anticipate will happen we dont know any better. We should not blame ourselves we have had a tough life and many things negative have happened in the past and we become addicted to expect the worst.

The future is just that it has not arrived yet and we have no control over it we can make plans and look forward but we can not control the outcome so dont waste fear or worry.

What we do have and can do a lot about is the Moment we have a choice enjoy it or be sad any one can enjoy one moment we dont have to think we can do it for the rest of our lives but if we try each moment to be happy and fearless, it will soon become a habit and we will be able to let joy and a little happiness back in to our life it is only for a Moment.

Hugs hun, and so sorry for what you are going thru. The only input I have right now is that even though you are taking your meds, and haven't missed any, sometimes when we are on these (or any) meds for an extended period of time, they begin to not be as effective as they were when we began taking them. The way I can best explain it is like this: I used to take Paxil for depression. It worked very well, until one day, I began getting more depressed and anxious with no real reason. I spoke to my doc and he explained that our bodies sometimes get to used to having a certain med in our system, so it loses its effectiveness. For me, he referred to it as "Paxil Poopout" He took me off the paxil, started me on a new anti depressant, and I was better in a couple of weeks. Hope it is something that easy to fix for you. Hugs, and best of luck. I hope that your drives /rides become easier for you soon. Hugs xxxxxx

Thanks for your responses. I think my biggest problem lies in the fact that I am up and down so much. One day--feel great and think that what happened is 'past' and won't happen again. Next day--back to where I was at. I believe that a lot of what is happening to me is related to starting school again this fall. Despite asking for accommodations, I am still contracted for full time and basically told (in so many words) that to try to replace me would be a huge inconenience and next to impossible at this point in time. The thing is, I TRIED to start the process a few months ago! The thought of starting school in three weeks or less is so overwhelming. That alone terrifies me. I think that the stress of starting work again is spilling over into other aspects of my life. My meds. may need to be changed or adjusted as well. Time will tell, I guess. Think I'll go call for an appt. with counelor to get his input. He has a direct link to the doctor who perscribes meds for anxiety and depression, so I can sort of kill two birds with one stone. My nerves today are shot--once again I feel fear and anxiety that gets bigger and bigger. I try not to dwell on it as then I get into a vicious cycle. I am so confused.

I think your depression or anxiety while riding in a car could be a control issue. That is what happened to me when I was hit and almost killed by a drunk driver years ago. A week after the accident I began having severe panic attacks and I would have my dad drive me to the doctor with me laying in the back seat. I was fine if I were driving, but the worst part was without dependable transportation I had to take buses around town sometimes and I would get the panic attacks. What helped me was medication and coming to understand about the control issue. Also when I took up self hypnosis and meditation the panic attacks left and haven't returned. I wish you well. Please feel free to contact me.

I love reply #2.. I couldnt even come close to saying anything as amazing as my friend scotsman1.. Hope you can find away to get over this honey.. Hugs from the dancing bear..

my mom has this problem too. its gotten worse over the years and reallys limits her travelling. she has never visited me because of it. im sorry to hear its affecting you too. I hope u can overcome it. *hugs*

so sorry you feel this way, it must be terrifying. scotsman as usual had wonderful words. *hug* i hope you get through this soon

Once again, I thank you for your words and support. I did see my counselor today and he told me much what Scotsman said! Are you a counselor, Scotsman 1? He told me that what is happening is huge anxiety (probably related to my job) which turns into panic and for some reason manifests itself on the road. He also thought that I should see my doctor to get his take and see about meds. so I have an appt. with him on Monday. I do feel better and feel that there is a bit of hope. What surprised my counselor was that I was not angry. I was despondent, lacked hope, very anxious, and somewhat depressed, but not angry.

Before seeing the counselor, I decided to do something that I had said I would NOT do. I made a phone call and started a process so that my employer will have to (at least I hope so) allow me to have a reduced contract. All of my anxiety is related to my teaching job which will start again this fall. I have had no break this summer as I just finished my master's degree and am currently taking another class. If you go to my profile, you will see that I also have MS, asthma, diabetes, type 2, and the beginnings of COPD. The depression and anxiety were under fantastic control until this past May. Now, I feel like I am going all the way back to that 'black hole' I swore I'd NEVER go back to. I'm fighting it though and I finally have hope that I may win my own personal battle. It is because of all of you that I can continue to fight for myself.
I'm travelling 200 miles tomorrow to pick up my son at the airport. My husband will drive the first 1/2 and I'm going to try and drive the part that terrifies me the most. I need to push through the anxiety or it will get worse and worse according to my counselor. Wish me luck! 200 miles there and 200 miles back. Please say a prayer for me that the terror will not appear and if it does, that I can successfully push through it. Sorry this is so long; just wanted to provide an update and let you all know that I am trying to find the right path. I love DS; I can support others when they are down and I am fine and vice versa. (Or we can commiserate together!)

Take care, all of you!

Michelle

I have developed a rather irrational fear recently also. I hesitate to mention it here....but I could also use some advice as to how to deal with fears that have not been a problem thus far...as it makes me feel stupid or silly.
best of luck hon.....I hope we both figure this out.
{{{{{big hugs}}}}}}}

I get panic attacks while driving. Most specifically when I'm by myself and at exactly two miles from my house. I'm sooooo close. yet not quite there and I can barely breath. And as a passenger, sometimes I close my eyes. Loud trucks, someone's radio, cars moving to fast too close. all of that triggers me too. Now if the road was deserted well maybe it would be better. Just wanted to let you know I relate a bit. Hugs to you hon. Hope it gets better. For me just knowing it will get better when I finally get to my destination helps. So I know it always ends. Whew. Cause I think I would think I was dying if it kept up for hours.

this being somewhat abrupt and "new" for you, I would inform the doctor. Can't hurt and it may be some kind of important sign.