Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
Hi All;
Hope you are all well - and happy Wednesday to you (or hump day:)).
I haven't been on this forum for a while, so I thought I would revisit it - as I am in some need of objective assistance.
Typically - I am an upbeat person who is very busy in life. I am a purchasing administrator by day and a musical theatre/actor/opera performer by night. I had just recently closed a play on Saturday that had been the best theatrical experience of my life. In the last 4 days I have had a cloud of anxiety and depression. At first it started out as an anxiety which has quickly turned into a depression in the last few days. Basically, I have not had this dark feeling for almost a good year now after I went through a terrible breakup with a threatening partner. At that time he had told me that a few of my friends that have a reputation for not being so nice, had been slandering me. At that time I had believed what was said was true. After distancing myself from this maniac - I had also decided to take a break from the friends as well without even discussing it with them. In that time I had done a few more performances and generated new friendships with other positive upbeat people. Since then life has been great with no complaints. In August I was at a venue and I had bumped into these friends. My anxiety and piped up and I basically had said hello to them and continued on my way. Since that occurrence, I felt a feeling of guilt as I generally do not treat people that way - and the fact that I had not given them an explanation as to what had occurred back in last winter with the ex was not fair. So I took that into consideration that this may possibly not be true. Fast forward to mid October - I bump into another one of the friends at a venue and explain to them the situation - they were very understanding and were to pass the message along to the main (ring leader) friend who has a reputation for being a not so nice person. The message got there after I decide to send this person an email to say hello. In there I also apologized for my side and explained to them my reasoning of my ex's accusation - and asked for him to have lunch with me. He agreed and said he missed me. Long story short - I meet him. Lunch goes fine but as soon as I saw him I have been feeling a cloud of regret. It appears that we no longer have much in common anymore. Basically, this person wants to be best friends again and I have had to slow down my responses on the texts. The main reason for getting together with him is to prevent any awkwardness in social settings with our current group of friends. I figured by meeting him would be a good way to bury the hatchet so to speak - but since that occurrence I have been feeling dread and sorrow that I just can't seem to get out of. He isn't a terrible person at all, he has a heart of gold - but is just very passive aggressive when things don't go his way. I don't know if it is the situation, my intuition at picking up negative vibes, or is it my head trying to create drama that doesn't even exist. Also, we closed the amazing show we had on the weekend - so I am not sure if this is also "post show blues"?
At any rate, what I am looking for is suggestions - do you think making amends with this person caused this or is it the post show blues? How do I shake off this feeling and get back to being my energetic self again? He wants to meet up again which is fine I dont mind keeping things casual but I have grown so much since I have taken my break (taken up yoga, meditation etc) but I dont want to be these peoples best friends. This depression feeling feels like it did last year but not as severe as I have nothing to be fearful of, but it just sucks and I really would like to get out of this funk.
Sorry for the long post (as ridiculous as it sounds) but any would be appreciated. Thanks
Hope you are all well - and happy Wednesday to you (or hump day:)).
I haven't been on this forum for a while, so I thought I would revisit it - as I am in some need of objective assistance.
Typically - I am an upbeat person who is very busy in life. I am a purchasing administrator by day and a musical theatre/actor/opera performer by night. I had just recently closed a play on Saturday that had been the best theatrical experience of my life. In the last 4 days I have had a cloud of anxiety and depression. At first it started out as an anxiety which has quickly turned into a depression in the last few days. Basically, I have not had this dark feeling for almost a good year now after I went through a terrible breakup with a threatening partner. At that time he had told me that a few of my friends that have a reputation for not being so nice, had been slandering me. At that time I had believed what was said was true. After distancing myself from this maniac - I had also decided to take a break from the friends as well without even discussing it with them. In that time I had done a few more performances and generated new friendships with other positive upbeat people. Since then life has been great with no complaints. In August I was at a venue and I had bumped into these friends. My anxiety and piped up and I basically had said hello to them and continued on my way. Since that occurrence, I felt a feeling of guilt as I generally do not treat people that way - and the fact that I had not given them an explanation as to what had occurred back in last winter with the ex was not fair. So I took that into consideration that this may possibly not be true. Fast forward to mid October - I bump into another one of the friends at a venue and explain to them the situation - they were very understanding and were to pass the message along to the main (ring leader) friend who has a reputation for being a not so nice person. The message got there after I decide to send this person an email to say hello. In there I also apologized for my side and explained to them my reasoning of my ex's accusation - and asked for him to have lunch with me. He agreed and said he missed me. Long story short - I meet him. Lunch goes fine but as soon as I saw him I have been feeling a cloud of regret. It appears that we no longer have much in common anymore. Basically, this person wants to be best friends again and I have had to slow down my responses on the texts. The main reason for getting together with him is to prevent any awkwardness in social settings with our current group of friends. I figured by meeting him would be a good way to bury the hatchet so to speak - but since that occurrence I have been feeling dread and sorrow that I just can't seem to get out of. He isn't a terrible person at all, he has a heart of gold - but is just very passive aggressive when things don't go his way. I don't know if it is the situation, my intuition at picking up negative vibes, or is it my head trying to create drama that doesn't even exist. Also, we closed the amazing show we had on the weekend - so I am not sure if this is also "post show blues"?
At any rate, what I am looking for is suggestions - do you think making amends with this person caused this or is it the post show blues? How do I shake off this feeling and get back to being my energetic self again? He wants to meet up again which is fine I dont mind keeping things casual but I have grown so much since I have taken my break (taken up yoga, meditation etc) but I dont want to be these peoples best friends. This depression feeling feels like it did last year but not as severe as I have nothing to be fearful of, but it just sucks and I really would like to get out of this funk.
Sorry for the long post (as ridiculous as it sounds) but any would be appreciated. Thanks
I Think It's Very Possible That The Situation Concerning Your "Friends" Has Triggered Your Currant Bout Of Depression.
I Think You Should Take Things Very Slowly. You Have To Put Yourself First. If Your Heart Is Telling You To Back Away From Someone, You Should Listen.
You Don't Have To Do Anything You Don't Want To Do. If Being Their "Best Friend" Does Not Appeal To You Then That Is Absolutely Fine. You Have The Right To Your Feelings :)
Sending ((((((HUGS)))))
I did have a talk over with my best friend and she suggests to keep him at arms length - to continue to keep in contact but to gradually keep the distance longer and longer - until he eventually gets the hint that I am not interested in being "besties" but merely friendly acquaintances. and when I do see him to tell him that I am not the same as I used to be and that although I am very busy with things, I would like to see him once in a while - that way no feelings are hurt and I can have my needs met - I tend to agree with this. We will see how it goes as I do meet with him on Saturday for a movie - I am confident I will pass this and take it one day at a time.