Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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suck in an endless hole

adriennetellsittruei
adriennetellsittruei
Can't seem to find a way back. Ever since i lost custody of my son and going through 2 relatives passing back to back, nothing has been going well. I can't eat regular, sleeping is almost non-exsistant. I cry every day and all day and I feel so numb and cut off from everything dear to me. My counselors can't seem to help and I have no one to go to who understands what Im going through that is close to where I live that is friend or family. My trust and fear of everything has cut me off from the world that I literally struggle with daily normal life. My whole life has been me pretending to be someone Im not for the sake of everyone around me that I have absolutely no idea who I am and what I would want out of my future anymore. I feel so worthless and such a failure that I still can't see a way or path in front of me that may be promising. Everyone tells me to be strong and live my life for myself, but I have never been about myself in all my life to even know how to start or feel comfortable in doing that. I know I need help. I know I need strength. Im just so tired of fighting a pointless battle and trying my best only to fail and get crapped on in the end.
aprilmillett88
aprilmillett88
im so sorry, i know how you feel. just know you are worthwhile and your life matters. i am depressed too and trying to get out of my dark hole and its hard. im 28 and i feel like my life is over sometimes. dont give up and be strong. sending hugs and love
koolman
koolman
For me, when my life feels like dog-crap, I get to work on something, a creative project of some kind. I exercise. I'm a photographer who'd normally be photographing weddings, but that business is pitifully slow this year, so in addition to working a security guard job I hate and could care less about, I take pictures and upload them to stock photography sites.

And "family" can be formed anywhere with anyone. Yes, many people can be selfish assholes, using you for their nefarious motives, so you've got to remain vigilantly observant of them, and when it becomes painfully obvious they're using you, withdraw, retreat into yourself. When they've earned your trust, trust them.

Communing with nature helps me when humanity seems shit. I like to ride my bike to parks or the beach and just hang out, listen to birds chirp and waves crash against sand. It's very soothing. Riding my bike long distances also exhausts me so I sleep like a baby at night.
adriennetellsittruei
adriennetellsittruei
Thank you guys. Because of how bad myy depression and anxiety is as well as having social phobia with the depression, Ive been in my room living with family for most of my life only getting worse. My interests don't interest me anymore. I wish I knew there was something better to hold onto that would drive me to want to fight or be strong.
deballina
deballina
The only way out is through. Keep putting one foot in front of the other. I understand your struggle and relate - the wishing there was something better to hold on to and fearing there isn't - but I just keep getting up each day and trying again. When I was very depressed in the past my doctor told me it would end. That depression comes and goes. She was right. Your in a bad spot but can make your way out if you just keep plodding along and trying to change your circumstances. Sorry for the recent loss - that may play into more of it than you think. You've experienced a lot of loss. Be gentle with yourself.
nevik
nevik
You may not have custody of your son but you still have your son. Think of the joy he brings you when your with him. Build each day towards the next time you will spend with him and what you will do with that time. I also face depression and recently lost my younger sister to cancer at the age of 49. So I understand the depression and isolation even when others are around me. Deballina makes a good point in her post. There will be times that are better just have to be strong though these tougher times.
adriennetellsittruei
adriennetellsittruei
Im still trying. Its a lil hard where my son is concerned becaused i know he partially chose to go live his other family. Which is why im hurting from him too. Its hard to be around him knowing and feeling that. I hate being so emotional, but its something completely different when it comes from a child. Your own child and in turn having nothing to fall back on. I mean you get nieces and nephews, but not being able to raise your own child for whatever reason tears a person inside. I try to distract myself of the thoughts. I try to occupy myself with anything possible, but the tears start up. I use to have friends and do things, but after i had my son, it was all me and him. Now its just me. Im sorry to here about your sister, nevik. Cancer runs in my family and i hate it. One of my nieces is an orphan because of it. I cant figure out where to go on from here without my son with me.