Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
Nothing particularly bad happened today to start the spiral. I've spent 2days reformating my resume and cover letter (for I don't know how many times now) - I still haven't finished, but I'm thinking 'What's the friggin' point?" Nothing will change! The horizon of completely broke (both financially and emotionally) is fast approaching, so it's really difficult to stay mindful, to stay here in the 'now', so difficult to choose opposite action to the emotion, impossible to switch off the negative self-talk - "You're a loser. A failure. Look how you've failed your family. You've just made a mess of everything. How could you screw up so badly? Wow, you've been trying to get a job for 15mo and nobody wants to hire you; there must be something really wrong with you. You're such a huge disappointment. You never succeed at anything..." It gets so exhausting!!
I'm so friggin' tired of this whole thing. I realize I'm a little bit more 'at risk' than I was a week ago (I'm safe!), but I just wonder how much further to the tipping point? I understand most suicides are kind of a spur-of-the-moment decision triggered by a single event (sometimes, pathetically insignificant), but it's enough to cross that line. My question is, how do you know when you're up against that line, so you don't cross it?
Sorry - just need to vent. Some days are just completely s**t!!
Continue doing your best..... If you have to take a step down from where your last pay was, and not such a great jib, Do it! At least you'll work, and pay bills etc. Till that better job comes.
Relax tonight, try not to think about anything bad or worrisome.
I have a family member who has been extremely successful at getting jobs and promotions who does this,
1. Research the heck out of the company so you can intelligently discuss it.
2. Get feedback. Discuss potential problems.
3. Work on getting allies or inside sources into the job hiring process.
4. Call the people your spoke with if you did not get the job, ask if they had suggestions about other jobs or how you could do better.
Also, I recently read Take Your Life Back by Dr. David Stoop. It really helped me get out of a rut I had been stuck in for a long time.
1. Trust in God and obey his commandments (not sure what religion you are but basically put spiritual stuff first). Pray, meditate etc.
2. You take care of your family by providing love first, then security. If you subtract your person (by suicide) it is then that you will have truly failed to provide for your family.
3. Be more aware of those in need around you. You are not the only one in this predicament - I think you said that more than a hundred people applied for this one job and that you were in the last 2...you didn't feel good when you were told that you had made it to the last 2 - imagine how the other 98 must have felt? If it seems right at the time: donate, give, to the less fortunate.
4. This could be an opportunity to become your own boss and to employ others, to go after a lifelong dream, to do things you love which may, as a by-product, bring in the money. The money is no longer your main aim. Of course it is, but it also isn’t – if you follow me.
5. Do not make the problem worse by borrowing on your credit card and putting yourself further and further into debt.
6. Are you taking your meds etc. - just thought I'd sneak that in, because you've got to take care of yourself physically and emotionally too.
7. Keep on going through the motions of trying to find a job. Eventually, stop trying and get a job. Or not, don't stress.
8. Never resort to any illegal means of getting money out of desperation and don’t step foot in a casino. Also, avoid get-rich-quick schemes and the like; and people who would prey upon you now that you’re vulnerable. Avoid loan sharks.
9. Early retirement? Apply for social security. This should probably come second to last but I’m putting it here because this is when I though of it!
10. The strong temptation to commit suicide can come at any time (without reason or cause); or if you prefer, we are always up against that line; only it’s invisible most of the time.