Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
My husband has depression and at some point about 8 or 9 years ago, maybe even longer, he has turned to self medicating with alcohol. He is also on antidepressants, high blood pressure medication and high cholesterol medication. When we first met, he told me of his depression but I really wasn't aware of what this meant and we never discussed it. He didn't seem to be any different than anyone else when we first met. I assume this was due to the elation of a new relationship. Eventually, he started drinking and now has a real problem which he admits but will not get help. I have read books, we have gone to marriage counseling, he saw a psychotherapist briefly after my threat to leave who specializes in depression and addiction. He didn't think the sessions were going anywhere so he stopped. I got him to see a AODA counselor but he left the meeting because he felt he was being badgered. All of the therapists have said he needs to address his alcohol issue first, then get his depression meds in order and then we can rebuild our relationship. He is such a happier more easy going person when he is under the influence of alcohol. I can see why he doesn't want to stop. He is starting to have health issues related to his drinking (high blood pressure, high cholesterol & high liver values). Has anyone else here dealt with this issue? I do not know how to approach him anymore as far as getting the help he needs so we can move forward.
If you mean alcoholism .. I am sure there are many. Among other things, your husband is an alcoholic and the professionals are correct ... he needs to address that problem and until he does, things are likely to get worse.
I advise you to educate yourself on the subject ... and seek AL-ANON services.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Al-Anon/Alateen
There are a couple of DS Groups you may find helpful:
http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Families-and-Friends-Of-Addicts/support-group
http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Alcoholism/support-group
I personally saw that alcohol was occupying too much of my energy and needed to change that. After going mainly sober for awhile, I've finally decided to not drink. Today is 67 days without a drink. In a sense, I had to come to this desire on my own.
My goal was to get to better health and booze wasn't going to allow that to happen. Now, I find that underlying depression and anxiety were being self medicated. I'm still working through this process and lean on friends, family, therapist and my doctor to assure me it will get better. My sleep and fatigue are with me and I'm working with my doctor to get medications balanced to help me sleep better and get out of this rut.
You may also want to post in the alcoholism support group. Alcohol and depression are bad bed mates.
The therapists are right about the order of events. Step one is addressing the alcohol consumption. When he drinks, how does he feel the next day?