Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I dont expect to get sympathy or anything from this post i just need to vent somewhere i know that people can relate. I am now about 6 months out of a 5 year relationship. The last time i saw my x was first week in feb. I cannot move on. This was a bad relationship too. He basically ignored me, never wanted to do things with me, wasnt there for me when i needed him. So when HE left (yup he left) it shoul dhave been good riddance. But we had a plan to get married and move into a house. When he out of the blue dropped the news that he was moving out and he had already gotten his own apt i was so devastaed. My entire life plan was changed. I no longer had any idea what to do. I had seen him a few times since he left sept 30th. Always the same story, oh i miss u so much but this is such a big commitment idk if i can get mrried now. I am too young bla bla bla (hes 32). And then he disappears and i dont hear from him. The last time we spoke and saw eachother he is now seeing other people. But the same story comes up where he cries says hes so confused then disappears. He has now blocked my number. Again, i dont know why i am so sad about this. I should be rejoicing and moving forward happily. But i cant even date. I have a tough time just enjoying my life. I notice everything reminds me of him. I think abotu him and whoever he may be dating constantly. I am in therapy and i am also on meds (for panic disorder previously diagnosed). I just cannot move forward. He was my life. And now its like my life was ripped away and left me there to bleed out.
It's hard to let go. But, beneficial to me.
It's like losing a person to death.
I just have this one thing to say:
Allowing someone like this to live in your head rent free is NOT good for you.
Easy to say, hard to do. But you are Not his "in between" support system.
Let him go...physically and mentally.
But that's just my opinion.
If you're in a healthy relationship n a person decides to leave it will hurt... but there is usually a level of respect, empathy, and care that makes you feel ok with that breakup.
Unhealthy or toxic relationships leave us feeling abandoned, rejected, and betrayed. Why? Bc while we were in the unhealthy relationship we were already struggling w feelings of abandonment, rejection, and betrayal
.... and doing our best from preventing it from happening by succumbing to our toxic partners manipulation.
Toxic relationships trigger all our wounds and leaves us confused and on the edge.
It is absolutely normal that you're feeling this way. Toxic or emotionally abusive relationships often have an addictive quality to them.
The first step to getting thru is to admit that you're addicted to this person. Knowing that drugs are bad for u (the relationship) doesn't stop you from wanting another hit (the relationship back).
There is an incredibly hard time period where you will ruminate obsessively about him and try to figure out what you did wrong.
You are physically going thru a withdrawal from the oxytocin, endorphins, etc. from a up n down relationship.
Notice how any contact good or bad... triggers some kind of relief...n then you start getting agitated again bc its been awhile.
No contact forces u to grieve, withdraw, detox, and process your pain without the constant retriggering.
Just wanted to let you know... you're not alone... silly...or weak. How you feel is absolutely normal.
Sending you light n love.