Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I've recently been able to finally gain control of my depressed moods. I think its been about a month now since I've fallen into a deep depression. In my last journal entry I explained how I accomplished this with positive thinking and figuring out what type of thoughts were sending me into depression and stopping those thoughts. However I believe I've come back to square one. The same place that sent me down the road to depression before.
All of my life I've been socially phobic. In some times of my life my social anxiety disorder was worse than other times. I don't believe I have a severe case of SAD but it is formidable enough to keep me living somewhat like a hermit, a turtle in its shell. Life is strange for a person with SAD. Human beings are social creatures and we need social contact with others in order to be content with life but I fear social interactions and need them at the same time. I feel very lonely at times but at the same time I want to be alone. I know that if I go to a party or family gathering I will be overcome with fear at some point then I become quiet as a mouse. I can't contribute to the conversations because my mind is blank other than a sense of fear and wanting to leave.
My depression started seven years ago. I've been married since 1987 and my wife was for the most part my entire social life. At some point I was very unhappy in my marriage. My wife and I got along like a couple of siblings who just argue all the time. It's a very very long story but I was close with my niece. She was like a daughter to me. I have no kids of my own. At some point I became very attached to my niece and it seemed like she was the solution to all my problems. We became co-dependent. My wife became very jealous of the relationship so my niece stopped talking to me. I was totally emotionally destroyed.
Loosing my niece was not what caused my depression. My feelings of depression began when I became too attached to my niece. My emotional dependence on her was the beginning of my depression. I still don't understand why.
My niece is in the Army now and she'll be 25 soon. We don't talk at all anymore but I think everything is OK between us. However, when I hear her name or if I hear anything about her it still feels like a punch in the stomach.
So now I'm back to my old routine. For the most part I live alone. My wife left me after I fell into this terrible depression years ago but she lives next door with her mom. My shyness still has a lot of control over me and I still have a sense of loneliness. I talk with family members on Facebook everyday but it doesn't seem like a good substitute for a social life.
I don't believe I'm going to loose my battle with depression but I need to figure out how to get out of this place. This lifestyle is what sent me toward depression in the first place
All of my life I've been socially phobic. In some times of my life my social anxiety disorder was worse than other times. I don't believe I have a severe case of SAD but it is formidable enough to keep me living somewhat like a hermit, a turtle in its shell. Life is strange for a person with SAD. Human beings are social creatures and we need social contact with others in order to be content with life but I fear social interactions and need them at the same time. I feel very lonely at times but at the same time I want to be alone. I know that if I go to a party or family gathering I will be overcome with fear at some point then I become quiet as a mouse. I can't contribute to the conversations because my mind is blank other than a sense of fear and wanting to leave.
My depression started seven years ago. I've been married since 1987 and my wife was for the most part my entire social life. At some point I was very unhappy in my marriage. My wife and I got along like a couple of siblings who just argue all the time. It's a very very long story but I was close with my niece. She was like a daughter to me. I have no kids of my own. At some point I became very attached to my niece and it seemed like she was the solution to all my problems. We became co-dependent. My wife became very jealous of the relationship so my niece stopped talking to me. I was totally emotionally destroyed.
Loosing my niece was not what caused my depression. My feelings of depression began when I became too attached to my niece. My emotional dependence on her was the beginning of my depression. I still don't understand why.
My niece is in the Army now and she'll be 25 soon. We don't talk at all anymore but I think everything is OK between us. However, when I hear her name or if I hear anything about her it still feels like a punch in the stomach.
So now I'm back to my old routine. For the most part I live alone. My wife left me after I fell into this terrible depression years ago but she lives next door with her mom. My shyness still has a lot of control over me and I still have a sense of loneliness. I talk with family members on Facebook everyday but it doesn't seem like a good substitute for a social life.
I don't believe I'm going to loose my battle with depression but I need to figure out how to get out of this place. This lifestyle is what sent me toward depression in the first place
H2oFanatic
Great first step. Explaining and talking it out. I was chronic shy when I was young. Fought it my whole life but i am much better now. Long story but I found out that is was just a fabricated emotion in my head that I could over come.. Still shy when it comes to pretty woman but working on it everyday like the rest of my life. If you want to talk feel free...
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