Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
Hi.
My therapist just told me about this site in hopes more support would keep me from crashing so low so fast. I'm in my 20s now and I've had trouble with depression since puberty. How it has affected me, how I've handled and hidden it, how I've reached out has all changed.
When I was young, I used self harm. Conveniently, I have a phobia of blades, so I was never a cutter, but I rarely have smooth legs. Mostly scratching, but there's been some worse. Most of the scars have faded finally. I used to lie in bed basically will my body to die, hoping against hope I wouldn't wake in the morning. My mom struggles with depression, too, so I guess she thought she could help me manage without seeking medical help.
I was 18 when I first tried to kill myself. I think part of my problem is that I continue to function so well up to those drastic moments. I keep going to school or work, and excelling even. I was never good enough for myself, but goodness knows I damn tried and eventually graduated from college with a 3.96 GPA. Even with all that, I still attack myself as stupid and useless. It's been hard on the relationships in my life to go from seemingly fine to sobbing and suicidal.
My longest relationship was a year, and then he went away and we were gonna try a sort of open long distance thing.... but he had a one night stand in the first two weeks, and I lost it. I started therapy around 19, and I was 21 and seeing a therapist who suggested it was time to try out antidepressants. I've been on Zoloft ever since, and my results have been hit or miss. I tried to off myself again 6 months in, but after doubling my dose, things have been mostly okay. I think doctors assume I can't be that bad because I function and frankly I'm pretty. I went to the ER after the second time and one of the orderlies said why should I be depressed when I'm thin and pretty? Like it works that way.
Anyway, now I'm living on my own in my new house and it's harder not having roommates. I'm trying to get them, but at least now I have a dog in my life again, which has always been such a great help to me. I'd like to get to know others who struggle with depression and just want to chat with someone who gets it, even when they're not experiencing it. I don't want to only be ever in crisis mode, so I hope some of you reach out.
Thanks,
Rini
My therapist just told me about this site in hopes more support would keep me from crashing so low so fast. I'm in my 20s now and I've had trouble with depression since puberty. How it has affected me, how I've handled and hidden it, how I've reached out has all changed.
When I was young, I used self harm. Conveniently, I have a phobia of blades, so I was never a cutter, but I rarely have smooth legs. Mostly scratching, but there's been some worse. Most of the scars have faded finally. I used to lie in bed basically will my body to die, hoping against hope I wouldn't wake in the morning. My mom struggles with depression, too, so I guess she thought she could help me manage without seeking medical help.
I was 18 when I first tried to kill myself. I think part of my problem is that I continue to function so well up to those drastic moments. I keep going to school or work, and excelling even. I was never good enough for myself, but goodness knows I damn tried and eventually graduated from college with a 3.96 GPA. Even with all that, I still attack myself as stupid and useless. It's been hard on the relationships in my life to go from seemingly fine to sobbing and suicidal.
My longest relationship was a year, and then he went away and we were gonna try a sort of open long distance thing.... but he had a one night stand in the first two weeks, and I lost it. I started therapy around 19, and I was 21 and seeing a therapist who suggested it was time to try out antidepressants. I've been on Zoloft ever since, and my results have been hit or miss. I tried to off myself again 6 months in, but after doubling my dose, things have been mostly okay. I think doctors assume I can't be that bad because I function and frankly I'm pretty. I went to the ER after the second time and one of the orderlies said why should I be depressed when I'm thin and pretty? Like it works that way.
Anyway, now I'm living on my own in my new house and it's harder not having roommates. I'm trying to get them, but at least now I have a dog in my life again, which has always been such a great help to me. I'd like to get to know others who struggle with depression and just want to chat with someone who gets it, even when they're not experiencing it. I don't want to only be ever in crisis mode, so I hope some of you reach out.
Thanks,
Rini
I don't think pretty has anything to do with depression. It's a good plus in life but does not have any thing to depression. Depression is an equal opportunity disease. It will attack the old, the young, the fat the skinny, the pretty and the ugly and anything in between. We have a lot of beautiful people in this group, inside and out. Glad you found the group. I hope it helps you.
I can't believe the stupidity in some people, especially those who work in the health field. Because you are thin and pretty, that means you can't be depressed? What an ignorant response to a young girl who is suffering so much. I really hope you have a good Psychiatrist. Do you also have a Therapist who deals in young women with depression and suicidal ideations and attempts? I think that is important. There are many functioning depressive people, that is not that uncommon but that doesn't make your depression any less important. You have come to the right place for a lot of support. The people on this board all can relate in one way or another and are all willing to help if they can. If at times you don't hear from many, it's because of time differences, they just don't know what to say at that moment, or they just aren't on that often. Don't ever take it personally okay? You can pmessage me anytime if you need or want to talk, okay? Gentle Hugs. Gramybear
I no longer work and am on disability. My job defined who I was...now I am lost. I have physical problems that is why I am disabled. I don't know if I'll ever get back to work. It makes me very sad. I'm not the same anymore.
Just because you are depressed doesn't always mean that you are not able to be with people or accell at something. Sometimes I feel it makes it harder to get help because people think you are just whinning for nothing.
I use to get the phrase to pull myself up by my boot straps...in other words..move on with it and stop being a baby.
People just don'e always understand. I wish you so much luck and care. It is great that you have a GPA of 3.96. Keep holding on. There are people here who understand what you are going through and are here to listen and to help. May God bless you with healing. deb
We are here for you. Feel free to PM me anytime.
By all means, please continue to do therapy. Look for the reasons that you have trouble letting yourself enjoy your successes!
Gentle hugs
I'm still learning about this opening up thing. My stepdad always talked about being a Mensch when I was little (primarily to my brother), but I felt like a tough facade was important. Now that I'm telling more people, I think it is easier, but I've certainly scared a few people. Thank you again for your understanding.