Hey Bernie,
I'm here.

Your new plan is going to be about getting on with your life. You need to focus on something positive that you can work on and stop planning your death. You're not helping anyone and you're not helping yourself with all of this talk about suicide. People here are genuinely trying to help you.
What are you going to do to help yourself? I'm sorry if I seem harsh but sometimes I think when people like yourself aren't responding positively to the support they are getting, then it's time to set some limits and to put ones' foot down. I hope you understanding that I mean all of this in a kind and caring way. And please get some help if you haven't already.

Bernie, I used to make plans to kill myself. It is not worthy. I didn't have help for many years and I understand how difficult it is this for you. When you do these plans, you will keep doing and thinking more on this. What about making plans to get better. The reason you are posting this is because a part of you has hope on getting better. May strength and peace be with you. Blessings. Light and love.

Somehow making such plans have calmed me down, perhaps the realization that there is no plan that leaves no mess, either physical or emotional.

So my plan now is to keep on living. I'm 63 now. Depending on which of my family gave me their life span genetics, I'll make it to either 101 (38 more years) or 85 (22 more years) or somewhere in between.

I've had those feelings too as far as a week ago, however I always look around and think about the people that mean the most to me, it's just a few but I know they'd be so hurt and devastated if they didn't have me in their life! There must be one something or someone that's still keeping you alive to wake up each day.
I wrote a post awhile back about even if you don't have friends/family just think about where you go on a regular basis like Starbucks or something, since you go there on a regular there's probably someone that you interact with and talk/laugh with who may love when you come in because they could be having a bad day but seeing you makes them feel better! You never know but small things like that are big things sometimes! Don't give up finding that light at the end of that dark tunnel! Sending big hugs!

I'm with Heidi. Sometimes tough love is the answer.

And that's true not just for folks on the outside looking in, but for the person experiencing the pain. You have to be tough with yourself if it’s more important to you to have a better life, than it is to wallow. You have to seek actual help from folks who can help you gain skills of introspection and get a reality check. Only when someone can look inside with the ability to be truly honest with him or herself, can they begin to figure out how to climb out of that sad, angry and dangerous rut.

The world sends sympathizers and caring people, but the world doesn't send anyone to sympathize forever, and the world doesn't send a rescue squad to our front door. It is up to each of us to know we're in charge of finding help and then to do whatever it takes to be happy. Sitting back and saying we're miserable and being resentful that the world isn't helping us, gets us nowhere, and the world doesn't like folks who refuse to help themselves. Wallow for a while, it’s okay, but if wallowing is your lifestyle then people will walk away and rightly so.

Only you know whether you just want sympathy, whether you want to blame others, or whether you are a strong enough person to take responsibility, find real help, fix your life, and find a way to enjoy it. There's nothing wrong with being in the dumps for a while, but there's plenty wrong with just shutting the door on life without trying. Wake up.

If you can become determined to make your own life better, who knows, you may find that in your struggle you learn, that giving something back, something of yourself, makes life livable. Give yourself away to find yourself.

You don't really need a plan to kill yourself. Just about anything will do it. It's not hard.

I think the question is why?

Are you genuinely planning on killing yourself, or is this just a phrase you utter when the going gets tough? Are you the kind of person who throws their hand of cards in when they look to be losing? or do you play to the bitter end and hope you can turn things around?

Because I think you need to realise life is a game, and it's the only game in town. There is no other game to play. You might not know the rules - but you can always learn the rules.