Depression Support Group
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My husband & I just had an argument because he has a habit of using my financial accounts whenever he needs money because he has no savings and he has a bad credit history, I'm sick of it and I had put my foot down so an argument ensued.
He has 4,000 on my best buy credit card, another 4,000 on my bank of america credit card and I am the primary co-signer on his car loan.
Not to mention that whenever he gets laid off his bills have to go on my credit cards because he can't get any credit cards and he refuses to save money.
I love him to death but feel like I'm being taken advantage of. I'm an office assistant making 12/hr while he's an IT Technician making 3000 per month. He does make monthly payments on all the debts he has in my name, but he only pays the minimum. There is no reason for him not to save a little money, I barely make anything and I pay all my bills and sometimes generally am able to save 2,000 for a rainy day. I never ask him to pay my bills for me and I always take care of my own bills when I'm laid off.
Right now I'm drowning in debt and the situation is exacerbated by the fact that I'm pregnant, have mounting medical bills, and can't work a 2nd job in this condition.
I don't think I'm being unreasonable in not allowing him to use my accounts like his personal piggy bank anymore. Right now we are not talking. This will probably be over and done with by morning, I just hate the way it's making me feel.
I don't understand why he has to be so bad with money, and if I take control of his finances he says I'm trying to run him. I don't know what to do other than what I just did. I know my new marriage will survive this small argument, but I don't want this to be a continuing argument. I don't want to feel like I'm being taken advantage of either.
I'm already depressed and this is not helping.
He has 4,000 on my best buy credit card, another 4,000 on my bank of america credit card and I am the primary co-signer on his car loan.
Not to mention that whenever he gets laid off his bills have to go on my credit cards because he can't get any credit cards and he refuses to save money.
I love him to death but feel like I'm being taken advantage of. I'm an office assistant making 12/hr while he's an IT Technician making 3000 per month. He does make monthly payments on all the debts he has in my name, but he only pays the minimum. There is no reason for him not to save a little money, I barely make anything and I pay all my bills and sometimes generally am able to save 2,000 for a rainy day. I never ask him to pay my bills for me and I always take care of my own bills when I'm laid off.
Right now I'm drowning in debt and the situation is exacerbated by the fact that I'm pregnant, have mounting medical bills, and can't work a 2nd job in this condition.
I don't think I'm being unreasonable in not allowing him to use my accounts like his personal piggy bank anymore. Right now we are not talking. This will probably be over and done with by morning, I just hate the way it's making me feel.
I don't understand why he has to be so bad with money, and if I take control of his finances he says I'm trying to run him. I don't know what to do other than what I just did. I know my new marriage will survive this small argument, but I don't want this to be a continuing argument. I don't want to feel like I'm being taken advantage of either.
I'm already depressed and this is not helping.
((hugs)) Patricia
You know in your heart what to do and it might be painful, but you know it's the right thing to do.
Good luck and be strong, its good for you and its good for him.