Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
Give me a little moral support, OK? Or tell me I'm wrong so I can ignore you like I ignore anyone I disagree with.
I probably do more chores around the house than any straight man you've ever heard of. Laundry, dishes, shopping, more.
But my wife is very critical of how I do some of these things. So far it's been just an annoying kind of critical - she'll take the towels out that I fold and re-fold them because she doesn't like how I do it. So I leave them in a pile for her to put away. Then she complains that I should only do laundry on her day off from work. Somewhere she read that the business end of silverware should be pointed up in the basket, so if I don't put something in there her way, the "right" way, she'll take it out and turn it around.
After it's been run she frequently opens the dishwasher up and starts putting the dishes away and I stop what I'm doing to go help. But she thinks that everything should be wiped off with a dishtowel. I won't do it. Today she started complaining about it and I told her that if I'm going to do these household chores she's going to have to let me do them my way. According to her that's a cop-out. I should do it the right way, her way. So I left the room and let her do it by herself rather than let the argument escalate.
Thanks for letting me vent. Since I didn't holler or break anything I needed an outlet.
Any of you married women, what does your husband do around the house?
I probably do more chores around the house than any straight man you've ever heard of. Laundry, dishes, shopping, more.
But my wife is very critical of how I do some of these things. So far it's been just an annoying kind of critical - she'll take the towels out that I fold and re-fold them because she doesn't like how I do it. So I leave them in a pile for her to put away. Then she complains that I should only do laundry on her day off from work. Somewhere she read that the business end of silverware should be pointed up in the basket, so if I don't put something in there her way, the "right" way, she'll take it out and turn it around.
After it's been run she frequently opens the dishwasher up and starts putting the dishes away and I stop what I'm doing to go help. But she thinks that everything should be wiped off with a dishtowel. I won't do it. Today she started complaining about it and I told her that if I'm going to do these household chores she's going to have to let me do them my way. According to her that's a cop-out. I should do it the right way, her way. So I left the room and let her do it by herself rather than let the argument escalate.
Thanks for letting me vent. Since I didn't holler or break anything I needed an outlet.
Any of you married women, what does your husband do around the house?
So when my second husband even OFFERED to help, I was so happy that I didn't CARE how he folded towels, or loaded the dishwasher, or where he put things away; I just put them back where I could find them and didn't say a word.
You are a grown man and are doing the chores just fine, so if she cant stand the way you do stuff, then she can't complain when you stop doing it. That's the way it is.
You are not a child.
I agree, your wife could use a course in sensitivity training, including expressing gratitude. Offering non-stop criticism is a thing I grew up with; it's no fun, it wears you down. It's just not conducive to a healthy, cooperative atmosphere, either.
Maybe approach her, at a good time, about what is on your mind. If you're both willing to see the other's point of view, it can help smooth things...
i do think your wife needs to learn to stop criticizing and maybe approach the subjed in a way that is more genle or kinder way rather then critically assessing everything you do and criticising you for how you do it.
i think you did the right thing by not hollering or breaking anything.
your wife also needs to learn she's not hurting you, she'e causing more work for herself, and thats not fun at all. in a way for her own self and yourself, she needs to accept the way its done.
usually us wives stick together regardless..but as you know of course I am gonna be on your side no matter what.
You do way than your share around the house and she is unappreciative. She should not belittle your effort with her OCD.
Here's what I do at home, not because my husband does housework not to my liking..but because he is an ass...
When i do the laundry, I refuse to wash his clothes. I will only wash mine. He is on his own.
Yes, petty thing for me to do, yet so satisfying! LOL
My hubby is pretty good with helping around the house but I don't like to let him get stuck with doing much of it really because he already works 50-60+ hours a week. We're not an 'old fashioned/ traditional role' couple by any means but that's just what we do and what we've agreed works for us. What you're doing now obviously isn't working - you are both getting frustrated - keep trying to talk with her and between the both of you you need to decide what you're both willing to agree on and you're both willing to compromise on. Best of luck xxx
Go on strike :)