She chose you for a reason. The reason is that you have the strength to give and to support her. You are supporting her and you have given her what she needs in this time of need. It is impressive.

sorry about your knee surgeries. maybe you will have to scale way back on the support you give your friend. you have to take care of yourself first. if she needs emotional support perhaps she could get into counselling or come here herself. have you talked to your friend about this. I am a caregiver too and at times I just can't do it. have to let it go and let the chips fall. rest up.

It's a noble thing to be there for others, but perhaps you need to leave her know that you are struggling too? True friends should be there for each other. Hang in there. (and maybe try to find somewhere you may find the support and encouragement YOU need.) Someone told me (and they were absolutely right)-- It is hard to continue to give and do all for others when "our cup" runs dry. (we need some positive encouragement put back in or there is nothing left to give.

Best of luck and hugs, Kim PS I have had both knees done too. I was fortunate though and had no real issues.

Thank you so much for positive feedback. It warms my heart.

It's Great that you are her support. It shows Great character and strength. Just be sure to look out for yourself as well. Come here often and reach out to people. Hopefully we can provide some support and comfort for you

Hey mahon, hang in there. These posts remind of a saying or Proverb; "A cord of two strands is not easily broken", it might be "three" strands, but it doesn't matter.
I agree with veggiequeen that you should let her know your own struggles. The thing I like about the saying is that the strands are under the same pressure, one is not necessarily doing anything differently than the other--it's a together thing. Stay there for her, keep encouraging her, only try and start to give her the chance to reciprocate.

Hello, I took all of the advice and had a candid conversation with my friend. She completely understood, it was positive for both of us. I also started seeing a therapist and am feeling positive about that as well. This is a great space for expressing myself. Hopefully I can have a positive effect on someone else when they need it. Thanks and gratitude.

Hello @Mahon.

Thank you so much for writing your thoughts on this post. You seem like you really care about your friend and have been there for her. As I read your post, there are two thoughts that I had. First, taking a reference from the late Stephen Covey in his book The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, here is an analogy:

Think of two men cutting down trees in the upper mid-west, each with his own saw. The first man is a hard worker and just wants to get his quota of 50 trees done as quickly as possible. He starts cutting and doesn't stop for any reason until he completes his quota. The second man is also a hard worker, and he wants to get his quota of 50 trees cut as quickly as possible, too. But, instead of just working through without stopping, the second man stops to take breaks to rest, drink water, and most importantly to sharpen his saw. The more we work to support others, the more we need to refresh ourselves. We always have to take time to "Sharpen the Saw". Even Jesus did this. After a long day of preaching to the masses and healing people, He would slide away off to a secluded place and rest.

The other thought that I had was that your post reminded me of when I was single a number of years ago. Things were going horribly wrong in my life and I felt alone and at the end of my rope. Then one Sunday morning I was awoken by the sound of a voice deep within me that said, "go to church!". I did just that and found a love for God, His Word, prayer and a peace that really helped me through the next four years until I was married.

I wish you the best and please know that I will be praying for you.

Blessings,

Kevin