Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

24,601 Members

160,807 Posts

0 Online

jade52 01/30/2015

I am not suicidal but I have reached my breaking point~ My family treats me like crap, all they want me around for is to cook, clean, and serve them~ All day long I cook because everyone here has a "special diet"
Then they ask me why I never go anywhere or why I am so unhappy~ I have told them I get no respect from anyone, from my husband down to my grown children that still live with us~ I feel like my children talk to me any old way because they have learned from their father~ He claims he loves me but how can you love someone, yet you are always fussing about something I did, or I can't do anything right, and the need is felt to correct me and shake his head, or get angry with me and yell at me then give me the "silent treatment" for a few days~ I am not an angel but I do try to treat EVERYONE with respect~ I am so unhappy and I am on medication for depression/anxiety~ I don't know what else do because I do not want to leave MY house~ Any suggestions from anyone?

jade52

survivor69 01/30/2015

HAVE THEM FIX THEIR OWN MEALS............................................
CAN U DO THAT?
HUGS
PS. I SEND HUBBY 2 A LOCAL CHINESE RESTAURANT WHEN HE IS IN TOWN.
I DONT COOK ANY MORE SINCE MY BRAIN SURGERY.
I FREEZE THE FOOD HE BRINGS BACK. LOLOLOL
THEY HAVE A HUGE MENU 4 VERY LOW PRICES.
A GREAT RESTAURANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GBU
D
;-O

ThePepperMan 01/30/2015

I agree with survivor, get your grown children involved in the cooking. Plan ONE meal that you will make. If people "NEED" special foods then point them to the kitchen.

If they protest, such as "I work all day", then remind them that if they lived in their own place the would have to prepare their special foods all by themself. At least here they can be in the kitchen with you so it won't be lonely.

Do your grown children pay rent? If not then start charging them!

WanderingVet 01/30/2015

Not sure medication will correct spousal belittling or resident and disrespectful grown children,

I recommend intense marriage counseling ... at the very least.

blackhawkdown 01/30/2015

If it aint done to his specification then he can bloody well get off his lazy ass and do it himself!! Sounds to me like a big wooden spoon meets butt cheeks therapy is in order!

Bobby5000 01/31/2015

First the food. Initially consider items that everyone can deal with and if not, fix one thing and have everyone else eat it or deal with it.

I would try to work on your relationship with your husband, both of you are probably at fault, and would NOT put him last on the food list. Instead, I'd be more likely to put him first, get something he likes and let him or everyone else try to make do with the various dietary requests.

gramybear 01/31/2015

You shouldn't have to leave YOUR house for any reason. Maybe if you stopped doing all of these things for everyone, they would understand exactly how much you do for them and it's not as easy as they seem to think it is. You deserve to be respected, not used. And of course you aren't perfect and aren't an angel but show me someone who is! Please don't let anyone treat you like a doormat. You deserve so much more. Hugs GB

gramybear 01/31/2015

HI again honey. I made a post about a song that brought tears to my eyes. I hope you will listen to it. Hugs again. GB

Kellie30 02/01/2015

Have everyone take turns with cooking and housework.
They may understand more about all you do and appreciate you
more.

koolman 02/01/2015

I agree with all of the above.

sandmom 02/01/2015

I agree with a lot of the people here saying to let the older kids fix their own food. I would fix what my husband wanted for dinner and if the kids don't eat it well then they can make something for themselves. And as for the kids talking to you the way they do I think as they get older they test their boundaries because I have tried to teach my kids good manners but lately they too seem to think they know everything and can disrespect me. I totally get how you are feeling because I too feel like all I am is a maid with no appreciation. Hope things get better for you!

gramybear 02/01/2015

Oh, that explains it.. Their at that age syndrome... They are the very difficult years because they truly think they know everything until their life starts crumbling and guess who they come running to? Yep, you got it!! Hang in there... Hugs, GB

LivingWater 02/01/2015

A pessimist once made this joke:

"The first half of your life is ruined by your parents, and the second half is ruined by your children."

But sometimes the two phases OVERLAP, and we get to have both halves of our lives ruined by both parents and children!

There is no SOLUTION, it's the human condition. But it's never wrong to ask for RESPECT. That's the minimum.

debsue123 02/02/2015

It is hard to have any selfesteem when you are beat down by others all the time. I am in agreement with survivor69 to let them make their own meals and get the guts up to tell them you will cook again when they treat you with more respect! Even for your husband...give him the silent treatment every now and then and see if he likes it. I know this is hard to do and I am on your side. I had to learn to stand up for myself to stop being everyones doormat. You can do it...I believe it is within you. Best wishes
deb

Join the Conversation