You are not alone.....others may not understand but I think you know I do......

Still hoping peace will show up in your world!!!!

I think the fact that you are reaching out here means at some level you either appreciate the value of life or want help.....
Please hang in there.....

My capacity to contain these thoughts has been severely compromised to the point that I must express them at some level...
In essence, my 'cup runeth over'...

Just knowing that you are posting and talking with us is a good sign. And I too, am so glad you are reaching out. Please let us know what we can do to help,, That is what we are here for. Hugs GB

I honestly wish voluntary euthanasia was here for those of us who have mental health problems who can't find a cure, because there isn't one. As someone who would be fighting you to be first in that line for the treatment, but also has no choice - what can we do, but find the joy in life that there is? Try your best to write down, to experience and to aspire to finding your own happiness.

For me, I am at the stage where if none of it means anything, if I'd prefer to be dead, then what harm is there (so long as I harm no one) following my own dreams - I mess up, okay I want to die, I succeed, at the moment - okay I want to die.... none of it makes a difference other than I may be a bit happier for bit.

I hope you find happiness.

Youbreatheout, you had the courage to say something virtually no one would dare to here...

"I honestly wish voluntary euthanasia was here for those of us who have mental health problems who can't find a cure, because there isn't one. As someone who would be fighting you to be first in that line for the treatment, but also has no choice etc"
I'd be fighting for first place as well.

You also said " what can we do, but find the joy in life that there is? Try your best to write down, to experience and to aspire to finding your own happiness." Kind of hard to do when one day just blends into another and nothing is appealing anymore.

After much soul searching, therapy, meds, and still not finding a glimmer of said happiness, the question remains, why must we continue to exist?

I am just a source of consternation to what little bio family I have because he can't understand the dynamics of my mental distress.
Everyone else I've known is now "too busy" with their own lives to spend even 5 min. chit chatting on the phone.

Yes, there are Christmas Angels all around, but only the blessed and the fighters are visited by them.

I hope you find your own happiness as well.....

Trust me, those aren't the only people that have angels, please trust me on that one. There is hope for all of us. I believe in my heart that there is. I have days where I don't believe that myself and wish I would just go to sleep and not wake up, but then when things are good, I'm so grateful that my wish didn't come true. For all of you that are feeling like mal is feeling, please know you have people right here that want to help you through the bad times, when you feel like you are in the depths of hell. Hugs GB

I am sad that you are finding it difficult to find value in life. As far as understanding -- my impression to date are that there is actually a lot of mysteries and multi-impressions of what life is going on.

You are such a great writer -- and I will continue to believe in the other part of you which keeps you here.

Kind, the part that keeps me here is nothing more than inertia & perhaps my own pessimism, that things may not actually be better in oblivion..