My suggestion is to not only be fair to yourself but also your husband, something that I love doing when in conflict is writing down pros and cons, figure out what you want and where you wanna be but be fair to all parties involved. Just do what your heart tells you to do and if you want to know something, find out. Unsaid words can be horrible and lingure do whatever will let you be at peace

Sorry your ex didn't share your relationship vision! Even if it was only a fantasy, and he merely looked at you strangely in the dream rather than looking at you warmly, with passion, kissed you and said "I love you too", a more emotionally satisfying conclusion, sounds like a nice fantasy.

So sorry you are caught up in these affairs of the heart that have not allowed you to move fully forward with your life emotionally. Even though you have already moved on physically and married a wonderful man who loves you and your daughter like his own. I'll tell you a story many years ago when I was young I fell in love and married at the age of 21 years old. I loved her and her family and had our whole lives planned out together. I was shocked and devastated when she left me for another man only 2 years later. A year later I was still carrying a torch for her, I kept in touch with her family but never pursued her. No one was more surprised then me when one day she showed up at my doorstep one night and begged me to forgive her and take her back. I went out of my way to prepare my family and circle of friends for her coming home. Telling them to please don't judge her because I truly loved her and this is what I truly wanted. And we were just going to put this "mistake" behind us and move forward with our lives as a couple. (neither of us had filed for divorce yet). We planned a trip to Florida and took the "Honeymoon Vacation" we hadn't been able to do when we were first married. We had a wonderful time and I felt peace in my heart and thought all was well. New beginnings life was great again! I couldn't even imagine that shortly after we came home she would leave me again a second time for the same man. It was a defining moment for me I felt like a total and complete fool it was surreal. But it helped me get over her. The torch I was carrying for her was Extinguished and I moved on and filed for divorce. If that had not happened who knows how many years more I would have pined away for her love and affection. I hope that by your ex marrying that this becomes your defining moment in your life and allows you the strength to move forward with your own heart and truly embrace your marriage as you should and be thankful for the beautiful life that the 3 of you can share together as a family both now and in the future. Wishing you all the best, johnnyboy

You are not alone with how you feel. I never stopped loving my boy's father, even after remarrying and he doing the same. A part of me was always glad that they never had any children together, something that only he and I shared. I can't speak for others in the same situation, but for me, there was just something special with my first, and he always held a part of my heart that no-one could ever have. Hugs GB

i am very sorry you are so torn and hope yo can find peace

Thanks everyone , honestly sux to hear I'm not the only 1 who has been through something like this , and I fear they might have a child and then I'll really lose it ,things with my husband aren't good right now so Idk how that's going to turn out but still praying and hoping for the best and that something works out :/

My mind literally hates me , had another dream last night , he wanted to talk he came over and we went to some abandoned house and sat at a table and chairs that were covered in dust and falling apart and he looked at me and said I no longer hate u , then I looked back at him and said I'm really sorry but I love u , he said don't be sorry it'll all work out and then it ended with me going back to my house and I couldn't stop smiling . Woke up realizing that today is his birthday ..... Why won't this let me go ? ! About to clean this house and listen to some music and just cry

I never been on that side of the situation, but I do remember back when I had a girlfriend and she was crying over her ex at one point because of something he said about her, it really bothered me that she still cared about him that much to let it have that effect on her. I'm sure it's rough on your husband just as it is rough on you, as you two are together it will be something you both have to deal with. I remember that it made me feel like I wasn't enough for her or something, which hurt but he was her first love I believe and a lot of people have trouble getting over their first love.

I'm so sorry, and when it is your first love and the father of your child it is only worse. I can only console you with the message that you have a husband who love you and hopefully you can get over your first love and enjoy your time with your husband. Maybe this other guy wouldn't have workout so great in the relationship fantasy anyway.

i understand it's hard when these things happen, though.

Be kind to yourself. take a hot bath in the middle of the day, do a facial mask, pet your cat, have a cup of coffee, do some yoga. It does get better.

Good for you for not endangering your relationship and cheating. Try to get over this and pursue the new life you have with your husband.

BIG HUGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GBU
DB
;-O