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Lasting effects of abuse

Anna1212
Anna1212

I wanted to say something about lasting effects of physical and emotional abuse.  I was physically and emotionally abused by my father and brother.  My dad, when i was a kid multiple times, my brother once as an adult.  I am now in my 50's.  both incidents were decades ago and i had confornted both of them at the time.  I hadn't really thought that much about it over the years since it happened.  thought maybe my mind and heart had "resolved" it somehow.  I never really forgave either of them but it didn't occupy much space in my heart or brain.  On the back burner so to speak. maybe not even on the stove.  at the time it happened, of course, i was enraged and hurt. 


anyway, lately in the last month or so, enormous anger about what they got away with has resurfaced.  maybe stronger than it ever was.  has this ever happened to anyone else here?  


I realize that what happened has never gone away and never will.  that it is something that's a part of me and I, not they, are left to deal with it.  and i don't know the best way at this point.  i feel they should have both done jail time.  i hate both of them even though i still interact civilly with both of them once in awhile since they are family.


how in the fuck does anyone think it's ever ok to physically assualt someone?  in their family.  or anyone ever.


any survivors abuse want to chat?  I'm struggling with this right now.  thanks.


i may write more about this in my journal later.  

nancy6464
nancy6464
I am a survivor of incestuous sexual trauma in childhood. I have PTSD from it and am in both that group and the incest survivor group. There are a lot of abuse survivors in both of these groups .you may want to read through them and join if it helps you. When we write something out to process we say"TW" as a trigger warning so others who might be triggered into a flashback then can skip the read. i am sorry for the trauma that has brought you to DS but I hope you can heal here with us. triple hugs of support~
shadowlady
shadowlady
God bless you both. Thankfully I had a wonderful father. I'll keep you both in prayer.
Anna1212
Anna1212
thx guys. your comments help.
JAAKK
JAAKK
I am a victim too of rape and physical abuse. I am also in my 50's. Yes you are right this will never go away, but I learned you need to give yourself permission to forgive yourself and then find the courage down deep with in yourself and speak out loud or write a letter to all who were involved and let them know of their wrong and how much it hurt. Then let them know how they are NOT going to hold any bondage over you anymore. ( The past is in the past. It is time to learn something from that awful period of time and move on.) I find that helping others with their hurts and concerns helps me to heal as I visit with them. ..."Move forward as if you are in a race to reach your goal and receive a prize.." Strive towards better things in your life.