take some breaths. just spend a little time breathing. we are here.

I am very sorry that you are in this much pain. Fourteen days clean is wonderful. You deserve to give yourself some credit for all of the hard work you are doing. One slip is not a reflection of your character, it is just a slip. We all slip, we are just human. Be easy on yourself right now. Change is scary, it is understandable the way you feel right now, you are not alone, but tomorrow can feel different. You deserve some compassion and we have to do that for ourselves first. Deep breathing is great advice. How are you doing?

Hi Capricautious. I wanted to give you the numbers for suicide hotline in case you are continuing to not feeling well and need confidential assistance. Thank you for communicating how you are feeling.

https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/# (Confidential support)
USA: Suicide Hotline: 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-8255)

Hey capricautious it's not your fault trust me I have been there to. If you ever need to talk you can talk to me or a crisis lifeline they r really supportive you can text this number for the crisis number but text CONNECT to 741-741 ur not alone.

https://youtu.be/7XFLTDQ4JMk

It totally helps when you know the fact our mind have the tendency to stay with negative thoughts and its hard effort to stay away from it.
You have t work hard to achieve good while staying negative is so easy and so NATURAL!

Sorry you are in so much pain. Don't be so hard on yourself for having a slip up, We are all human and we all make mistakes. If you continue to feel suicidal, please call the suicide hotline or the crisis hotline as some of the others have mentioned and given the phone numbers.

HI There. I hope you are feeling better. When you have a moment please let us know how you are doing. It is important with consideration to your post and how you were feeling. Thank you

I'm sorry you're thinking these scary thoughts. When I was young, I heard a technique of "painting" your thoughts. I know this may seem silly but I tried it and had good luck. When a negative thought would come into my mind, I'd imagine that I had a roller paintbrush and I'd imagine putting it into a pan of white paint and rolling this white paint over the thought. If they thought returned, I'd just do it again. I had very good luck with this and later, as I aged, realized that I was taking control of my thoughts and rejecting the negative ones. I persevered and was able to overcome many negative thought patterns. Praying you'll rise out of this.

I've had success with journaling my thoughts as well as drawing. I just let myself go and write or draw. Sometimes it's just scribbles or doodles, but it seems to help. I also have an app for CALM that plays soothing music and shows a mountain or water scene that you concentrate on to get your mind off of negative thoughts. Color apps help as well.

Romans 8:39 "Neither the world above, nor the world below - there is nothing in all creation that would ever be able to seperate us from the love of God which is ours through Christ Jesus our Lord"

Strengthen yourself my sister/brother. Remember in THIS world, you have a choice. CHOOSE WISELY. I do not know you but I love you, because he loved us first and no one, not people, not drugs, not alcohol NOT EVEN THE DEVIL can take that away from us.

God bless you ❤️

I hope you have self-banned; it really helped me.

You know what? You are not alone. I'm in recovery. Let's see. This time, I'm sober for 2 weeks tomorrow. I felt the exact way that you do. Plan a daily stuff list (even if just going for a walk). Write down the PLAN. Make sure you EAT. I'm taking care of my elderly parents (both are 90). And, it really get's me down. I feel sooo much gratitude that I still have both of them, and on the other hand, it is so very difficult (especially being in early recovery) to watch them drift away. I live 20 mins. away from them. I know 2 people who could help them w/ groceries, laundry, and my Mother will NOT have anyone in the house. My suggestion for you: Take it one second at a time, and concentrate on what's right in front of you. Do not let your mind drift and I know that's really hard, but if I keep busy, I can't go to "that" spot. You know what I mean.

You're Beautiful You have a purpose here on earth and you matter stay strong we need you here

I watched my youngest brother struggled with addiction.....and I drank pretty heavily myself....I lost an entire year doing so....my memories of that year are gone. It won't solve anything by beating yourself up for slipping. We all know how difficult it is. Just keep trying. As far as pushing people away. Addiction does that. Depression does that. I've done that. But I've also found that the people that care about it understand and give me space when I need it. I apologize to them a lot. Maybe it's necessary and maybe it's not....it just makes me feel better about the whole thing. I love the suggestion the person above said about taking things a second at a time. Things can become overwhelmed if we don't. Please hang in there, okay?

Are there support groups close to you? I'm sober 60 days today and find comfort in AA meetings. I'm not sure I'm "all in" but it helps me get out of my head and be around others.

If you are in dire straights the Suicide prevention hotline is there