Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I've DVR Iyanly fix my life, and I was watching this ep from a couple weeks ago I think. And this woman was talking about not having a mom, and Iyalna said she grew up thinking that her step mom was her mom but could feel inside that it was a lie. When she grew up, she found out why she always felt like an outsider and wrong inside.
Growing up, I have always felt that I wasn't where I was supposed to be, that I didn't fit in where I was. That something wasn't right. I was always dent to stay with the same relative every weekend and during the summers. She doted on me and loved on me, and I felt so at home with her and er family. I loved it there. One night while I was staying with her I woke to hear an argument outside. She was fighting with my mom who wanted to take me home the next day even though I was supposed to be there a week. I heard them talking about how this person was trying to take me away from her. That she wanted to keep me and I should have been with her all along. I didn't tell anyone that I heard them talking. I never told anyone. But, I have always kept it with me. There are pictures of my mom pregnant with all my brothers and sisters, but no one has any pictures of her with me. My earliest picture is of me at about a year old. I just wanted to put that out there. Off of me, finally.
Growing up, I have always felt that I wasn't where I was supposed to be, that I didn't fit in where I was. That something wasn't right. I was always dent to stay with the same relative every weekend and during the summers. She doted on me and loved on me, and I felt so at home with her and er family. I loved it there. One night while I was staying with her I woke to hear an argument outside. She was fighting with my mom who wanted to take me home the next day even though I was supposed to be there a week. I heard them talking about how this person was trying to take me away from her. That she wanted to keep me and I should have been with her all along. I didn't tell anyone that I heard them talking. I never told anyone. But, I have always kept it with me. There are pictures of my mom pregnant with all my brothers and sisters, but no one has any pictures of her with me. My earliest picture is of me at about a year old. I just wanted to put that out there. Off of me, finally.
gordos4
9y1ing, OMGosh! I went through the same thing! A few months before my dad died in February, he told me he never thought I was his, until I started looking like his mother..He always treated me HORRIBLE, & made it clear I was never wanted. There are also NO baby pictures of me or my next oldest sister, who was also a "mistake". I always felt like I belonged somewhere else, with someone who actually wanted me. I was stuck, & my mom took off when I was 10, never saw her again. Take comfort in knowing it was in God's plan for us, it made us the women we are meant to be, & we are stronger for it. You are SO young, you will learn that experiences like that will make you a more compassionate, tenderhearted, stronger woman. I'm also sorry you felt so out place, I know how hurtful that is. Take care ((hugs)) Nancy
gustokitty
I think, if you want to know the truth, you should ask your mom. That's if it matters to you and you want to know. I was adopted, and although 50+yr old woman, I still wonder, and wish I had gotten my info when the files were open for about a year. But then they closed them again. I'm not the type that would have waltzed in and asked for anything. I just wanted to see her.
9y1ing
Thank you for the reply's, they make me feel understood and unalone. I didn't realize how much I needed that.
gordos4
I think gustokitty has a good point. I think you need to know, to have some kind of closure so it doesn't plague you for the rest of your life. You deserve to know, it's your right.
CHRISTOPHER310
I was adopted at about age 2 . I was an unwanted child. A throw away child. I was adopted into an abusive and violent family and to this day, the lies about my birth and adoption continue. I did find out the truth and both my biblical parents have long been dead. It took me years and hell, but I finally did arrive at a point of so what. So what about my birth and adoption. It is as it is and all my heart cant fix it to be better so I need to fix my heart on my present life being better. Have ever since I let it all go. Im adopted, an unwanted, throw away child with an abusive childhood. I am an adult in control of my own life and I happier.
Join the Conversation