Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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healingtears 04/19/2010

I have been having some tough relationship problems for a few months now and anxiety and depression doesnt help them. My family dosnt like seeing me upset and my boyfriend doesnt understand what I'm going through. I dont know if he will ever get it or I'm just waisting my time. He tries to cheer me up by joking around and picking on me but those are the things that are upseting me. To him though everything upsets me so he doesnt know what not to say cause everything is hurtful. I dont know how to fix this. I feel so alone and scared all the time. And to top it all of he got laid off from work and is moving back to FL where he is from so we have to deal with a long distance relationship along with the fighting. How can we fix things if we are so far apart. I dont want him to leave me and i'm so scared I wont be able to cope with him gone. I just want things to be clear. All the fear is too much!

deleted_user 04/19/2010

Be sure to encourage your guy by thanking him when he does something to cheer you up....even if it doesn't work. Be grateful he makes the effort. Sometimes a little positive feedback can go a long way.

healingtears 04/19/2010

Thanks I never really thought about it that way. The pain gets so strong I feel like he is out to get me. Sometimes I think he tries to get me going but he just likes to joke around and I'm serious.

deleted_user 04/19/2010

It may help if you are able to tell him what does help you or how you would like it for him to help you. He's trying to joke around and that is not working for you so tell him what does work if anything does. Also, you have to understand him too, he doesn't have depresssion so probably wants to be having fun his way too.

I guess there is no way you will move with him to FL. You fix things by keeping the lines of communication open and being honest with what works and doesn't work between you. Listen to his side of things as well.

I went through alot of fearful thinking lately so know how that can mess your mind and make you anxious. A long distance relationship can work if each are committed to making it work. Just be open and honest.

I hope you can feel better soon and that it will go well.

deleted_user 04/19/2010

most guys dont know how to deal with a womans emotional pain. i myself am guilty of just trying to put a smile on my gfs face, well ex now but you get my point.

hes just trying to help and a lot of guys cheer eachother up by either picking on the other or just getting a laugh out of em. like star said be happy he wants to try and is doing what he can. but be honest with him. thank him for trying to help and tell him that when all he does is joke it makes you feel like hes just making light of the situation. if she had told me that i wouldve stopped just joking all the time. tell him you want him to be serious with you.

healingtears 04/19/2010

I have told him I want him to be serious with me. He thinks I over react and sometimes I do. Things have gotten so out of control and when I have a panic attack it just makes things worse. I just go crazy. I think a part of me wants to push him away cause I dont wanna hurt. And I'm worried I have pushed him away. Every time I bring up working on things he tells me I need to control my anger. I feel like he just blames me and wont take responsibility. He says he needs to work on things but I feel like he blames me and dosnt think he did anything wrong.

deleted_user 04/20/2010

By getting this bottled up soup out to us on line, you have a safe "pressure relief", and you also get the bonus of talking to people like you who are at various stages of dealing with this. Panic Attack. Had them. Anxiety. Had that. Fear! OH YEAH. I found that I do not get to choose the way I feel, I only get to choose the behavior I will show while having them. Good job of getting it out. I feel you will get better here than you are feeling right now!

healingtears 04/20/2010

Thanks talking does help. I feel like the worry is so real and I dont know how to get beyond that. im so afraid of the future that it is messing up the present and all my fears are going to come true cause I am setting myself up for that.

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