Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I'm not sure exactly what counts. I just know that I can't tell them about anything because of their reactions. When I was younger, I had done self harm, and when I showed them they said they weren't deep enough to be serious, and asked if I needed attention. A year later when they saw more, my mom screamed at me and called me an ungreatful bastard and grounded me. Even though I am an adult kind of soon, they tell me I don't need privacy at my age. They make me tell them my phone password and look through my messages when they're angry. Last year when my brother overdosed, they blamed me for it and took away all my things, and my mom said she never wanted to look at me again. I told them I wanted therapy, and a day later when we were in the car, they locked the doors and told me I couldn't leave until I told them and they screamed at me for shutting down. Constantly things like this happen. Is this abuse? Could I get away with leaving here quietly and staying with someone? It isn't always like this, like right now we just played board games and hung out. But other times it's so bad and I feel so alone. Then they hug me and say they love me afterwards and it makes me so conf licted about how I'm supposed to feel.
Before going further, ... HOW OLD ARE YOU? Do you live in the US?
You COULD run from it, but I don't advise that. VERY young 'adult' on his own for the first time with NO, NONE support. It is tough and evil is all over the place.
What needs to happen is going to be hard to do, but the whole family needs to get into intense counseling. Your parents should realize this. It is not likely you can convince them of this. If you could, that would be step one.
MANY young men (and women) have gotten out of a bad home life by joining the military. Best thing to happen to most, worst mistake for others. You could talk to a recruiter if you are curious. The military has become picky in modern times. They now have some fairly stiff requirements. I hope to hell you aren't cutting. They will spot it and reject you (probably). The military expects and demands your best performance. If you can't give it, it becomes a mistake.
If either of the above are not doable, I say keep you head low ... keep discord at the minimum until you can GRACEFULLY get out on your own. Just know .... out on your own .... would probably be difficult. 'Staying' with people, .. friends, extended family, whoever does not work very well for a beginner. If he can't or doesn't 'pay his way', he is eventually asked to leave. There are tens of thousands of young people who are homeless.
Sorry my reply is not a happy one. I have to tell it like it is. Good luck to you, and I am sure others will give you some advice. Think about it all very carefully.
There are 2 great powers at your fingertips - but it is you that may not have the strength to grasp it. It is the power of Choice and secondly these 3 words "I love Myself". All else that happens in between this Experience called Life that you have embarked upon falls somewhere in a place clalled "Chance and Opportunity. If you are wise at your age you will seek wisdom and understand my words.
The way anyone including family members reacts to you is either their blessing or their karma but dear one it is not your responsibility. You are responsible for how You respond to this experience called Life. But you must make the wise choice if you do not choose to make wise choices today in life you will continually repeat the same lessons and it will hinder your progression and growth. Please take heed- there will come a time quickly when you will start a family and you will want to remember how you handled your experiences each one of them. The choice is yours - be brave and strong- and honorable to your self, your body, your mind- this is loving yourself. Abundant Joy to you - take time to meditate so that you can learn to observe these ups and downs in life with clarity and Grow through them instead of just Going through them.
Finally, your parents may seem intense to you- but people react in all different ways- some people have mastered the art of remaining calm no matter what- but just know that they love you and it is okay when a situation gets intense to go to another room ,cool off and re visit the topic or discussion later. Do not hesitate to seek counseling if you still have urges to harm yourself! It always feels better to talk to someone. Also please let us know how it goes because Daily Strength is a great Support Forum. Big Hug
They'd never go for counciling and neither would I. I can barely talk to them.
People tell me to "tough it out, there's only two more years." But I don't think I can handle it. I cry so, so much. Almost every night I experience the most intense emotional pain, so much so that it physically hurts, and have no one in my home to trust about it.
if things continue the way they have for the last 4 years, I am not in physical danger of them but myself.
I grew up in an abusive home. I think I probably would have been better off getting out of there for the last couple of years if I would have had the chance.