I know how you feel but my experience is significantly different because of PTSD.
But so far no your not a bad person to talk to as far as I can tell, and I'd hang with you cause I think your pretty cool.
Also I'm glad you don't want to end everything but why are you sad?
I've got terrible depression because of past events that had taken place in my family. But I'm trying to be strong cause this world ain't got nothin on me :)

I feel the same way as you especiallly today, just dont ever want to leave the house actually. I have just movied too a new city too and i have no ambition to do anything. i cant even unpack. IM SO BROKEN. i dont have a child tho, i could have but i decided to give up on having a baby, i had an abortion to make my new man happy and its made me miserable. I understand parenthood isnt for everyone, but i know ur mother instincts witll kick in, this is a disease, i dont think your a bad person. Depression and Post Partum are illnesses we desperately need help with. I know everyone says you must need the help yourself,, but i feel like everyone should have positive support along the way. Do you have that? I hope so, im trying to find a good supprt group myself.

I'm not exactly sure why I'm so sad. I guess it's because I really don't know how else to express my emotions. I get too stressed out and I try to find ways to calm myself or distract myself, but it just adds the weight to my shoulders.
I would like to think that I do have positive support but in all reality, I don't. I don't get along with many people apparently.

Squiggly you make some assumptions that aren't borne out by life. Or at least, haven't been borne out by mine. :D

1. Don't expect anything from life. If you're alive, and there is food to feed the children, then that is success. Anything more is gravy. friends are gravy. Clothes are gravy. Ability to leave the house - pure gravy. Understand the bottom line: you are a mother of a child. That's something you've chosen to do, and now you have to understand it. Imagine you're a tiger in the woods, raising her cub. Imagine you're a bear... How do you have to think in order to survive?

2. "is it just me"
No. It's everyone. We all go through this, it's horrible but it's just something everyone has to get through. You're no different from anyone; you're not enduring anything special. Being a mum at home with a small child is lonely, and depressing, and it's a growth time. It's a time when you change, and grow, and become a woman from a girl - and it's painful. It's emotionally painful.

3. "I'm tired of everything" well that just sucks. you'll be tired for the next 20 yrs probably. Think about the things that make you tired. Sometimes not doing anything will make you tired. Sometimes mess will make you tired. Make a space in your home that is beautiful, even if it's only a small space. Make it feed your soul. Do things to feed your soul. Take baby for playtime down the river, or at the park. Pretty places. places with fresh air.

4. I don't want to end everything but I don't want to feel like this any more.
What do you think this means? That your two choices are to continue the same, or die? When does time ever stay the same? Nothing stays the same.

Take this time of your life and learn from it what it has to offer. Take from it what it can give. It gives you time. Time to paint that painting. Time to write that novel.

You will never have this time again. Put it to good use. Work out what this time of your life can offer you that no other time could offer you, and USE it.

Always do this. All your life. It's the only way to live.

:)