Hey sweetie. I am so sorry you are feeling so bad and that you are in so much pain. I can imagine how hard it is to work near someone who is constantly rude and if you are being treated unfairly because of your weight, that is discrimination and if this person is the one treating you unfairly can you not report it to your boss? That should NOT be tolerated.

I sure don't think the world would be a better place without you.

(((((((((((( COMFORTING HUGS )))))))))

LMT

The person who is rude to me about my weight IS the human resource director. My boss knows about it but doesn't do anythingbecause he is pretty much useless. The mean, rude person is just the icing on the workday cake. I wish i could just sleep away the rest of my life. :(

I'm sorry TC :((

SHAME SHAME SHAME on the human resource director and SHAME ON YOUR BOSS. That just makes me boiling mad.

sending extra hugs........

LMT

Nah!! The world would not be a better place if you were dead!!!

You probably would be out of your pain. THAT part would be better.
But maybe there are ways to make you get better without ceasing to be!!!

When I'm horribly, horribly depressed, that's what I long to do, too!!! Sleep my life away!!!!

The closest I come to any sort of 'positive' feeling is when I drop into be at night.
I can hardly wait to sink into oblivion and escape my miserable existence for a few hours, at least!!!

And maybe the very worst part of the day is when I first open my eyes.
First, that split second of consciousness.
Followed almost instantly by a heavy feeling of being trapped in hell.
I feel like crying because I have to go through another day.
I wish desperately that it was bedtime again.

Blech!!! Working with a difficult person like that is horrible.
Sigh.
I don't know if it's anything that you want to pursue, but if you think you'll ever want to take your complaint to a higher level, start keeping a little notebook.
Document every single thing that goes on, making sure you name who was there, who said what, the date, hour, and minute that it happened, anything that happens.

What the HR director says, what you say to her, what you say to the boss and what he says to you and what he does and maybe more importantly, what he DOESN'T do.

It's rather amazing how a true picture emerges over time and just how much more stock the higher ups will put in what you say when you say it when you have an impressive paper trail that speaks of an ongoing problem of long standing.

They fear liability.

I did that for a few different reasons during the 8 years I worked at one company.
I didn't tell them I was writing everything down -- but I didn't hide it, either.
On the few occasions I was questioned about what I was writing, I just said, 'I just want to make sure I remember everything and that I've got it all straight.'
Sometimes, I'd ask them to repeat it while I wrote it down, LOL!!!

It was rather satisfying to see how uncomfortable they became once they knew I was doing that!!
They suddenly became much more careful what they said to me!!

That was another thing I did a few times.
When a higher up said something untoward to me, I politely asked them to put that in writing and held out my little notebook and pen to them.
They NEVER did.
I just said, 'Okay, I'll add that you didn't want to it write it down for me'.

That stuff worked well for me, but If you can't do anything to improve your workplace environment, oh, I so hope you can find a way to get out of there and find a less unhappy and stressful job!!!

I don't know what your pain is from, but depression often causes it.
Likewise, if you are having chronic pain because of something else, that will cause or add to your depression, too!!!

Are you on any meds for your depression?
Would you consider any?

From what you say, it seems like there's plenty of situational cause for you to be depressed. Even outside of chemical depression.

I'm sorry that your life seems pretty wretched at the moment, for whatever reason.

I hope things get better soon!!!

(((((Hugs)))))

I Am So Very Sorry Honey. This Person Is A Bully. Someone Who Derives Pleasure From Hurting Someone Else.
I Detest Bullies.
Please Remember That You Are A Beautiful Wonderful Amazing Person.

The Person Doing This To You Is Not.
Stay Strong Honey.
((((((HUGS))))))

As another poster noted, document everything. Every day, every rude thing this person says. I wouldn't be obvious at first. Once you have enough evidence (I wouldn't rule out recording it on your cell phone either) then let it be obvious that you're doing it. Also, I'd contact a lawyer, just so when asked what you're doing you can reply, "My lawyer advised me to do so." Also there may be some kind of requirement that you formally complain before it's technically harassment. Finally, I know it's tough out there because I'm trying to leave my job, but you might want to start looking around. Good luck!

I have to disagree with you. The world would NOT be a better place if you just went to sleep and didn't wake up. That is the way you perceive things because you are so depressed about some things that you have no control over, and some things that you do. If this lady that you work with has a problem then just feed her with kindness. It may not change her, but it will help you in the long run. You are just better then her, plain and simple. There are a lot of ignorant people when it comes to weight and unfortunately all you can do is make changes to your weight, or try to educate those that don't understand that not all weight gain is the reason for a person who eats too much. You are going to be okay, I believe you are a strong person. Hugs GB