i understand. ive been there alot over the years. but there is something i cant put to words. (i tried 3x - i just ended up tied down in a hospital, breaking my mother's heart & scaring my parents so bad.) i guess it's that speck of hope in that bad moment. hold onto that & do what u can when ud rather not. be well. sincerest caring & prayers.

Life is about change. It is the one thing that is never constant or unchanging. Whatever you think won't change will, or new opportunities will open up. Give it time.

Think of the hole you will leave. I tried and would up in inpatient for a while. I was really selfish with my pain, and I realized afterward what I would have done to those around me. You need to consider what this would do to those that love you. That is a hurt that you never recover from.

You can PM me if you want. I have been there where you are.

I understand, I just can't bare it anymore.
Life changes all the time but I don't, it's never going to be different.
I've been trying but it's so far gone now I can't even get a step ahead. Another doctor has given up on me. I don't see the point anymore.
I'm miserable and mad at everyone and everything.

dont give up - there has to be a way! my son feels this way some times and he knows he will break my heart and his son's heart. I know its hard and there may come a time when there is a breaking point but it can be different - if the dr gave up on you shame on him - get a good therapist or a pastor to talk to - I know my son's therapist doesnt help him -he has to find one,

I had a great therapist when I was in my 30's that really helped me and I also started a realtionship with the Lord and He has carried me through! I tried suicide and just ended up with a crashed car and broken clavicle - there are so many things that can go wrong! don't try it! please! Talk to someone - dont' give up!

Hi- I’m so sorry you are going through a rough time. If your doctor has given up on you, find another doctor that can help you.. You can also talk to any spiritual leader in your church or a friend you can trust. Life may be hard right now but I want to encourage you not to give up.

Praying for you for peace and strength so you will overcome the difficulties you are in. Feel free to post anytime. We are here for you.

Im sorry you are going through these tough times. I remember going through my lowest points and having no idea where to turn. It felt like I was just floating out at sea helplessly. Fortunately I had someone come into my life that pointed me in the right direction. Even though it took effort I was able to learn how to climb out of my depression and anxiety. I promise there is absolutely a way to feel better permanently with no more ups and downs to deal with. Im just letting you know from what I have experienced :)

I thought I had that too, someone I could talk to about it and maybe get on the right path but I think I'm even more lost then I was before. How many times can I crash and burn before it becomes too much for them, just like everyone else I confided in?
They said it never would but I just can't seem to accept that. People can make promises they can't keep.

I feel like I'm in a crossroads in my life. I can either jump full in a keep going on, or throw in the towel and just leave. I can't live this way anymore, I just can't. I have no outlet, I have no way to dig myself out of this hole I'm in. I feel like every time I try I get pushed right back down and I don't even have a desire to get up anymore. How can I get better if I don't even want to. It's seems better to me to just leave.

It is good for you to communicate here with others. Lean on all of us, we are here to listen. My husband was severely depressed in 2012, and we went through months of tough times. We did make it through and he was able to find some purpose and joy in life again. Find another doctor, you haven’t made the right connection yet

I can't even face the morning anymore. I called in sick again today. I can't leave the house. I don't want to leave the house.
I'm trying to tell my husband but I can't. I know I'm letting everyone down but I can't do this anymore. I hate myself and I can't stand another minute pretending I can. I just want to die.

Im sorry you are going through these tough times. I remember going through my lowest points and having no idea where to turn. It felt like I was just floating out at sea helplessly. Fortunately I had someone come into my life that pointed me in the right direction. Even though it took effort I was able to learn how to climb out of my depression and anxiety. I promise there is absolutely a way to feel better permanently with no more ups and downs to deal with. Im just letting you know from what I have experienced :)

You are here for a reason. You have rec’d your breath for a reason. I am so sorry that life has become so heavy. Please get help. Call a counselor or other hotline and tell them what is going on with you. God loves you, he has a plan for your life and there is a place that you fit-just right. It is just hard to see right now under your burden. But I assure you it is there. Look out your window and find the beauty of the world. Tell God you are thankful-for the breath of air, thankful for the beauty before you and ask Him for hope for tomorrow. Sometimes I just have to force myself to smile and say “thank you.” Please try. I love you. I am praying for you. God bless you.

With experience of failed suicide, quick changing of the mind & suicidal ideologies, I'm like if I really do an extreme attempt of ending it & I survive being worst off, like becoming a vegetable, life will suck even more.

I hope when I die there's an afterlife full of happiness and without pain & I can be with my loved ones that were taken from me, one by one (well, I knew 12 people that died in a single fire, but that's another story)...I mean, can it be worst after death? Is this life on this hellhole world it and we just become work food? I hope not....

I looked at a bottle of pills a few nights ago....I'm like this world is so ugly & filled with fake poor excuses of human beings, why stick around? And the holidays seem to increase such thoughts.

But sometimes--just still living can be the sweetest revenge.

(Yeah just trying to be poetic to dismantle making it too easy for the grim reaper)!

Letting things out like on a group like this can release frustration, but seriously, maybe even trying to go to a meeting for depression would be an idea to consider. It sucks with this pandemic to sit around with strangers wearing masks, but maybe call a mental hospital to see if they offer such meetings still or maybe find one that's offered on a computer with a thing like "Zoom"?

I tried to kill myself on Wednesday. I called in sick from work and while my husband was in the shower I started taking pills my dumbass fell asleep on the couch before I could finish taking them all.
I woke up and he had taken them away. Spent the whole day like nothing had happened.
The next day I called in sick again cause I didn't want to do it anymore. Then my husband decided let's go to the family doctor. She immediately told us to go to the ER. So we went to urgent care, were the stuck an IV in my arm and did the test with all the stickers on me. A day after the OD.
They sent me to the ER after.
They did they same thing, stuck me with a needle to take blood. Kept me overnight.
I told them I didn't want to do it anymore I didnt want to try anymore.
They forced me into this workshop over zoom on Monday.

I'm not going to do it. I'm not eating drinking. I'm sleeping just to pass the time but for what purpose.
I have a stach of pills they haven't taken. They don't think I want to just die.
They said I have borderline personality disorder.
I might shave my hair off it greesy and gross. I might have a shower so I don't smell anymore and while I'm doing that I will take these pills and not fall asleep this time.