Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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HarveyDent 10/01/2011

Honestly, I try to make the best of each day. Today though. I had to go to work, I share a car with my mom. I wake up expecting the car to be in the driveway, but it's not. I call my mom and tell her that I have to go to work and she starts bitching at me. She says she'll pick me up and drop me off while we're arguing. She claims I didnt tell her, when I know I did. I think her memory is shorter at times due to her age. Then it's 30min 'til I ahve to be at work and she still hasn't arrived to pick me up. So I call in and cancel work; because obviously she's not coming. She then has the nerve to come 15min 'til I have to be at work and ask me about it, then argue some more with me. I decide to go back upstairs cause I couldn't leave cause she was borrowing someones car. I don't have the key and I don't want to be responsible for somebody else's expensive property. (I'm not a bad driver, just can't afford any other hassles)

I barely get any hours a week and now the hours I would've gotten are gone. So it will be 2 weeks now with no work at least. I have nothing next week. I think I'll use the time to do something constructive. I honestly want to be independent but my family makes it hard I feel.
I generally don't like my family because I feel they don't respect me as an adult and try to tell me what I should do in life, regardless of what decisions I make. They don't respect my decisions at times. If I get into an argument with someone, even if I was right and they were being a jerk to me, somebody will but in and try to ask me to go apologize; when it's none of their business. They try to tell me what I need in life and what I should do... but don't know a damn thing about me or who I am as a person.

I'm honestly just venting here. I think I'll be okay in the end. I just find all of this irritating.

deleted_user 10/01/2011

that is crappy, but it sounds like you have the right attitude.

heretic 10/01/2011

So you've been relying on your Mom for a ride to work, missed work, and you want people to treat you like an adult. You say you honestly want to be independent but are going weeks without working. This post is really confusing to me. So you are sharing a car with your Mom, but the car belongs to a third party so you don't actually drive it - you just ... rely on your Mom to help you in a car that she's actually responsible for? I guess what's bugging me is the sense of entitlement. When you're an adult you learn nobody owes you a ride, and you sure don't argue with anyone willing to do you a favor! I know that if I didn't work for weeks I would be homeless, no one else pays my rent or for my food etc, but I am always grateful for rides when they are offered. I'm sure this will be considered offensive by some - but I really don't understand this post at all.

Zemphyra 10/01/2011

Meh... It's not about a sense of entitlement. If Harvey was treated like an adult in all areas he'd know what to expect, but having being treated one way one time and another at another time gets very confusing. It's like you never know how you're supposed to act. One moment you're being treated as a child getting told what to do and when to do it, and the next you're being chastised because you haven't acted as a grown up. So it's very uncertain. I understand what you're trying to say heretic. I also understand where Harvey's coming from as well. It's very difficult when you're getting mixed signals. Harvey my advice would be to have a look at other options of getting to work and such, so you're not having to rely on your mum. That way you become independent of her, and you can get to work whether the car is there or not. Just have another alternative transport option. I know in the short term this is a real blow for you financially and emotionally but I think it'll make you more capable for future instances. Hang in there, hun.

WallyBear 10/01/2011

Hi Harvey,

Every now and then my husband and I have to share a car.

(When one is in the shop) It really is a huge pain....................

I Hope Your "Vent" here helped.
Good Luck !

deleted_user 10/01/2011

my home life with parents was not good so as soon as i turned 18, i left home and lived on my own. i worked part time during high school and afterward worked full time and soon a job and a half. i didn't have a car but lived in a city in which i could take public transportation to work. it amazes me that anyone, especially with a crappy family, would stay home longer than they need to.

but that was a very long time ago. this is a way different economy these days. maybe harvey has less options.

deleted_user 10/01/2011

That sux...

How long does it take you to get to work. You couldn't have just ran late? That sounded more like an excuse not to go to work. But, hey, that's on you.

Use this as a learning experience. How about you buy a dry erase board and you and your mom can communicate when you need a ride to work on the dry erase board. Then, there will be no confusion.

It's not about the problem, it's about the solution.

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