Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I never would have guess I would want to die again. I guess I really don't want to die. I just can handle the pain. I love too hard. I care too much. I'm an all around mess. I'm a loner who does not like to be alone. I'm convinced something is wrong with me. That has to.be the reason why people always treat me badly.
"First, there is nothing silly about romanticism. I think it's beautiful and it takes a lot of courage. But it also HURTS sometimes and there is no getting away from that. I am reminded of a quote by CS Lewis:
'To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.'
You have chosen the path of being a vulnerable, "silly" romantic. Good for you! But to love is to risk being hurt. That's precisely why is takes courage to love."
There is nothing wrong with you. People are just assholes. You do not deserve to be hurt and none of that was your fault.