Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I feel as if I was a kid again, drowing and falling down a rabbit hole full of pain. Not wanting to see the day. Think that I would be better off leaving this horrid place at least the place that I am in currently. My heart is so heavy full of just dissappointments, and everytime i try to get a word out of how and what I feel I a wrong. I am word for feeling depressed and anxious. I just don't want to hear anything anymore. I want to close my eyes and open them back up again starimg at meadows of wild flowers and lavander flowers .Peaceful and calming. Butterflies floating and I look behind the meadow and it my sister starring back at me with her arm extended reaching for my hand. Man if only I could see her. If I could smell her and feel her touch. Anything that I would give to have all of that back. The laughs the smiles the late nights watching stupid shows that are the all about crime. But thats not goinh to happen, its not my reality. I just feel constant pain mentally drained and emotionally fearful that i might not ever be good for anyone .
Sending prayers of love and strength. I know it won't fully help, but maybe it can ease a small piece of weight off of you. let yourself have a good cry. Let it all out. It's scary and overwhelming but sometimes we need to pass through it and acknowledge it. If you wanted to try those free counseling text messages while you let yourself feel, if its to much, maybe that could help?. Put on your favorite childhood movie/show. Get your favorite comfort food. If you have a friend/relative you like to talk to, phone them even if its just to say hi. It can be about anything. I hate Journaling but I hear it is helpful. Even if you write out 5 pages back to back. Or keep posting on here. Being depressed and feeling isolated is the worst feeling ever. Please know you matter a lot ❤.
I'm sorry to hear you are feeling this way. I don't know you but I can certainly say, that you are "more than good enough for anyone!"
Sometimes our past, our childhoods, how others have hurt us, the words, the abuse, the cruel treatment from others - cling to us like scars that remind us that we don't deserve anything good or we are not good enough.
Those are lies. All fucking lies. Those were words and actions of disordered people who were too immature, addicted, sick, or messed up to deal with their own crap that they project that onto innocent people around them. They needed someone else to carry that, so they can continue living their soul-less existence.
That was never your fault, and you don't deserve that. Or anyone else reading this.
What you feel, and your recollection of events is real to you. Despite how others have tried to minimize it or gaslight you. Journal get it out.
But don't let it the pain and suffering you experience define who you are. Find healthy ways to release it that doesn't involve harming yourself.
Those that love us that are on the other side, are still with us. Supporting us and helping us. Your sister sounds like a lovely person and I know she wants you to grow and heal from whatever is afflicting you.
You are not alone, things can be different, don't lose hope.
Sending you light and love!!