Ah yes, the fake happy thing. It is a mixed bag. On the one hand people tend to want to be with us more if we appear to be happy, and less if we appear to be sad. So we opt for the fake happy.

On the other hand, the more time we spend pretending to be happy, the more we realize that we are not happy, and as time passes it really can gnaw away at us.

The solution?

I think that we all find the solution that works for us. I like coming here to DS depression group. This is one place where I can be who I really am (happy or sad, the real version) and not be shunned if I am totally down. I do have family and friends in real life who understand depression, but since they are not depressed they are not very able to handle the darker parts like people here do.

So please, for your sanity (as you are well aware of) find places where the darkness of you can be expressed. This lets you subject those feelings and thoughts to the light of day, and that often is enough to keep them away, and sometimes it is enough to squash them completely.

Welcome to the depression group.

Gentle hugs

Sweetie i know exactly what you're going through. it seems like you're dealing with lots of pain there. I don't wanna act like an ass but i really suggest you do something. I mean like getting physically active. I advice you to stand up and clean your room/cook something /go out/read a book/play some online games ... I know exactly what is it like to be alone with your mind and it's not a pretty good experience. So yeah i believe it will do wonders to distract yourself and keep your mind far away from overthinking stuff.
I wish you get better. Hugs <3 Hang in there

Sounds like a good time for therapy if this site doesn't help you enough. Don't be content with faking it. Sorry for your suffering.

I like your witty username! At least that made me smile! We people on the dark side always seem to be more creative than the "happy" people. Seriously ... it's the way we are wired, and wouldn't the world be a pathetically boring place without our wit and skewed sense is humor? Of course it would! lol. Just trying to cheer you up and see things more clearly.

So glad you are here among those who truly understand and love you just the way you are. But we don't want you to stay in that pit forever. Start a new hobby, go shopping, go for a walk--with or without someone else.

I agree that we overthink when we're alone and focus too much on our current circumstance. Invest yourself in someone else's life who may need something you have to offer! The world always appears better when we are focusing on others more than ourselves.

Take care, sweetie. And please keep journaling!

I think it's also healthy to admit you're not strong enough at times and that's ok. Certain people like on this site and a good therapist will accept you as you are. Let that encourage you to accept yourself without faking it.