Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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RockNMetalChic 04/09/2008

Today i am so blah- i can't seem to get going... been falling asleep on and off all day- which is not good considering i have a 1 and a half year old that i'm supposed to be watching... everytime i close my eyes i see the man who took my heart and ripped it out- and so sleep doesn't come easy i mean i am tired and i eventually pass out- but i can't stay asleep - been up for about two weeks now - running on 15 mins of sleep at a time and waking up when i hear any noise at all- the ac/heating unit kicking on/ the wind/ rain/cats / dogs- u name it and i'm awake and then i can't get back to sleep so i turn on the tv and watch it til i pass out again- dreams of my ex torture me- they have happened everynight since we broke up and its like my heart is being ripped out all over again - everynight... i need sleep before i crack- but i don't want to take pills cause i know i would get addicted- and then i'd be tempted to overdose- does anyone have any suggestions? i'm so stressed and tired right now and i'm trying to hide these bags under my eyes and drinking lots of coffee- but how long can i go on like this? its been a year so far on and off- mostly on- never thought sleep would mean so much to me - i used to say my motto was - i'll sleep when i'm dead - but right now i think i could sleep for about 3 days straight and then i'd be ok- but oddly i think i'd be more tired.... i don't even know what i'm saying anymore- i'm just babbling- anyways gonna go put the dishes in the washer and make some coffee and i'll be back... later gators....... anyone else wanna join me ?

ScaredandScarred 04/09/2008

Have you tried things like a hot bath, lavender, things like that?
Or even herbal sleeping tablets? They can help?

deleted_user 04/09/2008

hang in there girlfriend. have you talked with a dr about your not sleeping. hugs to you. i'm here if you need me. donna e

RockNMetalChic 04/09/2008

no haven't tried herbal stuff - but have tried the hot bath and all - it relaxes me enough to pass out and get the 15 mins before i wake up again ...

if i had a good doctor to go to i'd probably ask for a therapist- i think all my issues are just bottled up inside and i need someone who is not in my family or close to the situation to listen.... i have no insurance currently so i'm SOL on that- lol- but i do appreciate all the advice- much luv and big hugs! :)

deleted_user 04/09/2008

yes, I was just thinking I wish I could dig him out of yur heart..root and all. LOL. hugggzzz RocknMetal..it wud help so much if yu could talk to a therapist huni, it really wud.

RockNMetalChic 04/09/2008

i don't want him out of my heart though- as bad as it hurts - i'm finally realizing this means i really did love him and to have that feeling even if only for a while is amazing- i just wish he would open up his heart and let me in- and my heart will wait- cause one day we will be together- til then i can always get a daschund puppy for a companion and be ok .... but he has got to get out of my dreams- this is just stressing me out! i want to go back and redo last year and make it better and change this whole situation...

deleted_user 04/09/2008

I hope yu can and do huni :) lots of luv and prayers to yu and yu have my full support and luv huni:)

deleted_user 04/09/2008

That feeling you are talking about is amazing. So I completely understand. I think about the man that made me feel that way, everyday for the past 16 years. Even now, there are times I feel like my heart has been ripped out, I will always wish for those moments.
The only thing I can say that helped me was to keep on telling myself that I shouldn't waste my tears on someone who wouldn't cry for me.
Have you tried lying down and thinking about a happy moment and take deep breaths, knowing that things will work out in the end, whatever that may be? It helps me sometimes.

Hugs and more hugs to you.

Alphonsus 04/09/2008

I used to be a terrible sleeper. Then I started taking Klonopin(tm). Once I started taking this anti-anxiety med, I started sleeping through the night. It was the first time I slept through the night all the way for as long as I can remember.

Ask your doctor about Klonopin. (Holds up bottle). Use only as directed.

RockNMetalChic 04/09/2008

lol - but i wouldn't use only as directed i get addicted to meds very easily- this is why i can't do drugs- cause i know if i ever started i wouldn't be able to stop.... i take one lortab and i'm out for 2 days- but they make me sick- so i'd rather find a non meds way to sleep- although i think i need to be on something- i don't even know anymore....

Alphonsus 04/09/2008

Have you tried time release melatonin? It works great for some people. Totally non-addictive.

RockNMetalChic 04/09/2008

nope i will have to look into that- i need something- this is getting bad- i don't even have to set an alarm anymore cause i know i'll be up way before it goes off.... i just lay in bed til everyone leaves the house then i get up and get my nephew dressed and on the school bus and i'm up for the day with the 1 and a half year old....

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