Hello, I am Mike (NJ) and I cannot begin to say how lonely, overwhelmed and sad I am and have been for a very long time. I am 46 years old and have no children (legacy), currently out of work on workers comp hoping to have a job to come back to soon. I am also over my head in "debt". The saddest thing is that I honestly can say that feel like I have no friends.while I have been dealing with major reoccurring depression since I have been a child and dealing with self esteem issues. I think part of why I am in debt (major) is because I used money to try to buy friends which when they don't turn out to be genuine it really hurts. I am seeing a therapist for years, talking to a life coach and honestly trying to socialize more. I recently re-connected with an old childhood friend and his wife and spent some nights during 4th week at fireworks etc, I recently tried to reconnect again but politely told " I am real busy, well have to connect soon". I have a sister (older) who lives in same apt complex bit rarely see her partly my fault. I have parents who live on Florida and I cannot really share everything with them, my mom has survived a widow maker (heart attack) and cancer plus in the past the have bailed me out. I lived with my grandmother for years and she passed almost 3 years ago and I really really miss her greatly. I do have a cat Suzie with me but she hasn't been hopping on my bed at night anymore in many months.

I really don't want to come across as a drag but I am reaching out to hopefully make some online or telephone friends as I feel that I am close to the end....