Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I have been struggling with depression for years. I am on medication but yet still feel very hopeless and have recently been thinking that it would just be easier to end it all.
I lost my mom December 23rd, very suddenly. I took her to the hospital and they transferred her to another hospital an hour away. There was a very bad snow storm that night and it was late. She told me to go home and get a few hours of sleep and come down in the morning. I got a call at 5:26 am that she had been coding for 40 minutes and that I should come right away. I found out that she died 8 minutes later.
I am now stuck in a very unhappy and emotionally abusive marriage and we have to sell the duplex that my Mom owned and we were living in. I feel like my world is crashing down around me and I am paralyzed to do anything. I have actually told my husband that I am not happy and feel like I am just a door mat for everyone to use and he just blows it off. I was seriously considering getting my paycheck today and just leaving everything behind and live in my car somewhere else. The reason I didn't is because I have a 13 year old son at home. If I died though, my sons would get my life insurance policy. It just has to look like an accident. I have a seizure disorder, so if I were to drive off a cliff, they would just think that I had a seizure while driving.
I lost my mom December 23rd, very suddenly. I took her to the hospital and they transferred her to another hospital an hour away. There was a very bad snow storm that night and it was late. She told me to go home and get a few hours of sleep and come down in the morning. I got a call at 5:26 am that she had been coding for 40 minutes and that I should come right away. I found out that she died 8 minutes later.
I am now stuck in a very unhappy and emotionally abusive marriage and we have to sell the duplex that my Mom owned and we were living in. I feel like my world is crashing down around me and I am paralyzed to do anything. I have actually told my husband that I am not happy and feel like I am just a door mat for everyone to use and he just blows it off. I was seriously considering getting my paycheck today and just leaving everything behind and live in my car somewhere else. The reason I didn't is because I have a 13 year old son at home. If I died though, my sons would get my life insurance policy. It just has to look like an accident. I have a seizure disorder, so if I were to drive off a cliff, they would just think that I had a seizure while driving.
I met with my 18 year old daughters school counselor yesterday because she has lost all desire to do anything after losing her brother. The advice the counselor gave to my daughter is something I am going to try. She said to fake it until you make it.
I am sorry for the loss of your mom snd for your marriage. It sounds like you need to get away from your husband and get to a women's shelter if you have no other resources. You need to get away from the abuse and focus on yourself and your kids. And I agree that your kids need you to go on living. Hopefully you will see that, too, when you get away from your husband.
I do not know the details of your marriage, but possibly some emotional things being said right now are due to circumstances of grieving? Loosing her right at holidays, suddenly, I am so sorry.
The loss of a parent, then taking care of her things, home etc, a verbal abusive marriage, grieving, trying to be strong for yourself, your son, is a lot at one time. Be kind to yourself. you need time to grieve. let your son know you are hurting, share your feelings, and also let him know, how much you care for him too. Kids pick up on more than we give them credit some times. you want to make sure he is not picking up on any negative vibes, you may leave him. Hugs, prayers, do not feel bad for putting yourself first. you need to take care of 'you' so you are there for your son.
Heidiclark, good advice also, her son needs her and she needs him to go forward together. People have no clue what a struggle depression is all the time. even when you try to explain.