Negative thought patterns are actual neuro pathways made in our brain, according to my therapist. The more we think the same negative thoughts, the deeper the path becomes. My therapist told me I have to make all new neuro pathways, just like someone who has had a stroke. It will not be easy, she said and I will need to practice every day.
So when I find myself thinking those thoughts, I immediately say-out loud- I am brilliant, I am kind, I have people who support me and care about me, my life has a purpose even if I am not sure what that purpose may be. Saying it out loud feels funny at first, but not so much now.

Best of luck to you and hope this helped. I treasure my time with my therapist, so that might be something for you to look into as well...

L

Might help in the short term but I youtube my favorite party song and sing and dance. It distracts me. Also started using an adult coloring book. I'm artsy to begin with so I love it and it's a great distraction. You need to change your situation too of course but sometimes it helps to stop ruminating and get a distraction going.

What you're describing is understandable. I suffer from the same thing.

With my doctor's help, I learned that changing my thought stream helps. Meaning, try to think about something different than what is causing you pain.

Some people say, "just don't think about it" which is a huge over simplification. Switching your thoughts to something less painful takes work, but it can be accomplished!

When you feel the sadness coming on, try to 'distract' yourself by changing the subject internally. Start small. Sometimes a simple chore or reading will help. The toughest is the first few steps, but I know you can do it!

Good luck and write more if needed. Good way to distract too.

I found the following helpful. Personally I make a lot of mistakes and get angry at myself and sometimes the results. I now do the following.

I have a list of mistakes and suggested solutions (late for meeting, expected to get there 10 minutes ahead of time, overenthusiastic prediction of time, got delayed, failed to appreciate importance of timeliness) I starkly criticize myself where appropriate, keep a list and go on.

In my mind, I have been constructive and addressed the problem or situation. Nothing more can be done and I realize that pondering over it more does not help. Writing down problems does prompt a constructive process of improvement.

>> How do I change the way I feel about things.

Since feelings are fluid emotions that cannot be chosen and changed like our underwear and socks, it would be helpful to know more about what you are actually meaning or wanting to say or ask there. In my own case, I work at changing what I might happen to merely *think* about one thing or another and then refuse to ever again let "Mr. Feelings" drive the bus. An example:

Today I received absolutely nothing in return as had been promised from certain people, and I had spent many, many hours over several recent weeks in preparation and anticipation. However, my thinking had been straight all the way along and I had done it all for them rather than for myself. Getting to that kind of point with my thinking staying well ahead of my emotions has been a tough row to hoe, but living off the dividends sure trumps crying into the dirt (self-pity) while digging potatoes only for oneself.

Hi again Barbara. I examine words. "Stop" is a negative word. Nothing can come of "stop". "Go" is a positive word. When I'm experiencing negative words in my head, I go and DO something that will yoeld SOME positive result, however small, even if it's a short bike ride or taking a couple pictures. It gets my negative thoughts out of my head and places them somewhere else in a positive DIRECTION. The negative thoughts may still be there, but the positive ACTION supplements them, diffuses them, chills them out, balances them.

Yin and yang. Pro and con. That's HEALTHY thinking, natural thinking as a well-balanced human being with a well-balanced perspective.

Also, accept that some "things" are the way they are. How you FEEL ABOUT such "things" being the way they are is irrelevant. Death, taxes, corruption in government and big business, these are realities that we can't change. Change what you can change. Accept the rest, fight against it when you can.

I HAVE SITUATIONAL AND CLINICAL DEPRESSION.
I TRY 2 CONCENTRATE ON MY BLESSINGS RATHER THAN WHAT MIGHT HAPPEN BUT DOESNT, IF U GET THE DRIFT.
GBU
DRENA B
;-O

Reply #1 in particular makes a lot of sense to me so I will attempt to give it a go for myself, wish me luck.